This Will Melt Your Panties Off!

Is it too early to start thinking about Christmas? If you answered "hell yes it's only September" then normally I would agree with you, but not today. Today I am saying yes to thinking about Christmas, but more importantly yes to thinking about a Victoria's Secret Christmas! You all know how much I love that store - the matching bras and panties, the little see thru teddies, the list goes on and on. It's just heaven! I'm not sure what this year's holiday season campaign at VS will be, but I'm hoping it's as hot if not hotter (is that even possible?) than last years. Take a trip down steamy memory lane with me and relive the 2004 commercial. Trust me, you will want to see this!

Play Video Here

Throughout the video the seductive words of...'Tell me you love me. Tell me you miss me. Tell me you want me. Excite me. Dazzle me. Delight me. Bring me to my knees. There is no gift like a Christmas gift from Victoria's Secret. Tell me there is no other woman in the world like me." are repeated over and over again by Victoria's Secrets various top models. I don't care what anyone says, that is THE HOTTEST COMMERCIAL EVER MADE! Oh my God! If that doesn't make you want to run out to Victoria's Secret than there is something wrong with you. I could watch that ad 100 times and still be turned on by it. I know the guys have to agree with me and I'm willing to bet the women do to. If you know a hotter advertising campaign, I sure would like to see it because I don't see how anyone could beat this! The marketing group on this one was just pure genius, simple but yet so effective. It talks to both sexes.

What guy doesn't want to see his girlfriend dressed in one of those skimpy numbers talking all sexy to him and what girl doesn't want her guy to buy her that stuff and say all those romantic phrases to her...and if he actually meant them, I'm sure that would be even better. I'll tell you whatever you want to hear and then some more if you just run that video one more time. Bring me to MY knees - I bow before your beauty.

It's hard for me to pick a favorite clip from the video since they are all so great. Although if I must choose just one, I would say it's the scene with the girl in the bedroom that has her arms all twisted and tied in the sheets doing a stripper-like dance in front of the fireplace. I thought about putting a fireplace in my bedroom a few weeks ago and now after seeing this, I think it's mandatory I do just that. As you may know, VS also runs the "Angels" campaign with these same models. So if any of those Angels want to drop out of heaven and fall on top my lap and play Santa Claus, I would be more than ok with that. I've already begun collecting my list of "naughty girls" for this year and believe it or not, all of those models are on it! It looks like they will have to sit on Santa's lap and tell me what they want. Perhaps if they are "bad" enough, they just may even get it!

Credit to "TTiSoB's Blog" for finding and hosting the video. See my other Victoria's Secret post of interest...

• 07/13/05 Victoria's Secret Is To "Think Pink"

Ask Jeeves Fired, Ask DIAMONDKT Takes Over

The popular search engine "Ask Jeeves" has announced plans to axe the cartoon butler character that is almost as old as the site itself. The site is now just called Ask.com The company stated that the character caused consumer confusion and no longer represented the direction of the search engine. If I could ask Jeeves anything, it would be "who uses you when Google is around"? I just don't get that since Google is king of the search engines (at least in my eyes they are). Despite a number of makeovers the character will be phased out very soon. No exact timeline has been released for the change, nor has the company revealed if they will be changing the name of the site. However...

Along with the sad news of the firing of Jeeves, comes along some happy news! I've taken it upon myself to slide into his spot...at least for a day. So no more Ask Jeeves, it's now Ask DIAMONDKT. Just like the old Jeeves, shoot away your questions at me. They can be on anything! Wondering why your computer hates you, ask me. Wondering where your girlfriend's G-spot is, ask me. Wondering who will win this years Super Bowl so you can start placing an early bet, ask me. Now I never really used the original Jeeves for anything, so I can't say how accurate he was with his information. Although I promise to do my best to answer your questions. Keep in mind that if you try and refute the knowledge I share after asking me a question, then I will be sending this dead girl after you. Also remember, there is no such thing as a stupid question, only stupid people.

Now if you will excuse me, I have my best Ask Jeeves, I mean Ask DIAMONDKT suit to put on so I'm prepared.

I Like My Coffee Tall & Black Like My Men

Don't be confused by the post title. I'm not "coming out of the closet or anything". I'm a straight guy - honest. The reason I say don't be confused by that post title is because I had used the same title for a similar post about caffeine addicts and in particular Starbucks junkies, but then I decided to switch the title to be used with this post. This news was brought to my attention from an "Anonymous" reader who commented on the previous post telling me the story of how Starbucks had put a controversial quote on the back of some of their coffee cups. Now not being a Starbucks patron myself, I wasn't aware of this news. However, I found it to be news worthy enough to blog about. The controversial coffee cup quote was about "gay pride".

Now it doesn't take a genius to know that most Starbucks consumers are straight laced business types. So when Starbucks decided to push the envelope a bit and give their coffee drinkers a little something to read and ponder over while they sipped away, the image above is the idea that they came up with. Starbucks says it was hoping to inspire old-fashioned coffee-house conversations when it introduced a campaign this year featuring the words of notable Americans on its coffee cups, but at least a few of those words are sparking more discord than discussion. Case example, a national Christian women's organization is accusing the Seattle-based coffee maker of promoting a homosexual agenda because of a quote by author Armistead Maupin, whose "Tales of the City" chronicled San Francisco's homosexual community in the 1970s and 1980s. Maupin's quote is just one of several dozen in "The Way I See It" promotion. He says "My only regret about being gay is that I repressed it for so long. I surrendered my youth to the people I feared when I could have been out there loving someone. Don't make that mistake yourself. Life's too damn short." Alright, so now the way I see it...

Who cares if they put a famous quote like that on the back of your coffee cup? I probably wouldn't even notice it being there if I had the cup in my hand. People will always complain about something in life, so the big stink over this I can believe. To me, I give it as much thought and allow it affect my life about as much as the "Recycle - Save The Environment" words on cups. Yes, recycle but don't get off on some anti-green peace kick because a company printed those words on your coffee cup. Who cares? Whether you agree or disagree with me, the way I look at it is homosexuality is not a choice. I feel you are born that way, just like I was born straight. Some people are born with a great sense of humor, some are born with great athletic talent, some are born with the ability to sing without lessons, others are born intellectually gifted...on and on. You get the point.

I will say that yes I think it's silly that there are gay pride parades. I can understand you wanting to be open about who you are, but do you need to dance thru the streets screaming out "I'm here, I'm queer, get use to it" with rainbow flags and poster boards? I don't feel the need to join a straight parade and do that (not that one even exists). I'm just as open about my sexuality, so why the fuss over being gay and proud of it? I don't know. All I do know is that it doesn't really concern me or affect my life one way or the other. You are what you are and if you ask me, I kind of liked the quote on the back of that Starbucks cup. If you are a homophobe, then take the "gayness" out of the quote and view it as what I feel he really meant by it - that if you love someone, then love them and don't be afraid of what other people think about it. Perhaps some of the uptight, stuffy Starbucks patrons might want to sip on that thought next time they have a cup in their hand. Who knows, you may even feel like getting "extra cream" next time you go - ok, now THAT was gay.

***NOTE***
The title for this post was obviously a joke. I like white men too - kidding. Just give me a hot girl and some of that Starbucks whip cream and I'll make it thru the morning and into night just fine without any caffeine.

Study Claims Caffeine Addicts Are Fat, Sexless And Will Die!

As we move into the mid-week, or as it is often referred to "Hump Day", Wednesday is upon is. Usually Monday mornings are bad enough having to get up early for work after getting to sleep in for the last two days over the weekend. On a Monday you are trying to recover physically from the weekend warrior mentality and just get your body and mind back into the mundane swing of your office. By the time Wednesday rolls around, you feel like the week is dragging and you need a quick "pick me up" so you can get to your weekend planning of fun. So many people use and often abuse caffeine. Whether it be in the form of coffee, tea, soft drinks, energy drinks or some people have even been known to throw some caffeine tablets back, we are all guilty of doing it from time to time. While some may only do this occasionally or just have one or two cups of coffee to wake themselves up in the morning, what about those that live for the stuff? They can't even function without it!

I'm talking about those of you that can down an entire pot of coffee before 9AM and then you need to get the 7-11 Gulp size Mountain Dew for lunch. That excessive use of caffeine is an addiction and it may be killing you! That's right - drink caffeine and die! Ok so I'm not a doctor, but I do have a handy little chart that allows you to select your favorite caffeinated drink of consumption and then input your weight into the box below. Then all you do is hit the lovely little "KILL ME" button and it will calculate how much of your favorite caffeinated drink it would take to kill a person of your weight. Cool, huh? Yes, I thought you might like to try it. Visit www.energyfiend.com/death-by-caffeine to check it out.

If that isn't enough to convince you to put the Sanka back on the shelf, perhaps this will...One study claims that there is a link between obesity and caffeine. Apparently, having caffeine in your bloodstream makes your body convert sugars into fat quicker, instead of metabolizing it. Other sugar-laden drinks like lemonade don’t seem to suffer from this problem. Now if that isn't enough to make you stop drinking, an even more shocking survey commissioned by Dunkin’ Donuts states that "42% of coffee drinkers reported coffee is more or equally important in any given week as sex." WHAT! Who are these idiots that would rather "get up" for coffee than sex? I think the caffeine has already begun deteriorating their brains, not to mention their sex drive and sex life. From the data collected in these 2 surveys, I gather that fat people won't be f*cking then? To be perfectly blunt, I think that's a good thing - rude I know, but true. Obviously those people need to seriously step away when some Columbians come to their kitchen window handing them coffee beans, that is for certain!

Just for the record, I'm not a coffee drinker. In fact I think I have only had a half cup of coffee ever in my life! Shocking, I know. That would make me somewhat of a coffee virgin? The only reason I tried it was because I wanted to feel "all grown up" as a kid and my Dad would always order it when we went out to Sunday morning breakfast. Of course I hated the stuff back then, even after adding milk and sugar to it. It just wasn't for me. So I stuck with my OJ which is by far a healthier choice anyways. Since then I haven't sipped coffee and I really have no intention in doing so ever again. I guess part of me is afraid I will get sucked into being a coffee drinker like the rest of America and I won't be able to start my day without it. To me that just seems like a burden. Therefore this guy is sticking with his OJ and ice-water in the morning. I bet if all of you coffee addicts would switch to that, you would feel better. Then again, it is probably still morning when alot of people read this and who am I to convince you stubborn people of anything...especially before your morning cup of java.

Sorry Starbucks, you won't be getting my business unless I'm buying something other than your granda lata fata moca choca espresso double frapo whatever you call it. Nothing about those drinks turn me on and get my motor running in the morning. I'll admit I do have soft drinks or the occasional energy drink like a Red Bull when I am pulling a long night work session, but other than that, I like to put more healthy gas in my tank. It seems that I'm not alone on the energy drink kick as numbers show that the energy drink market has grown 700% between 2000 and 2005. However, this Wednesday I am not going to blame my lethargic feeling from the absence of coffee in my life. No, I will blame it on other things like the lack of sleep, work stress, possibly a case of Mono surfacing or I can try and use jet lag as an excuse but then I didn't travel far enough where the time zone changed. Oh well, I'll just blame it on typing up an entirely too long blog post instead.

This 'Aint Your Granny's Flowered Wallpaper

You know how you have that one Grandma who has the tackiest taste the world has ever seen? As a kid, that mix of bright orange and brown and every other color in the rainbow combined in her house makes you say...."wow, cool!" It's not until many years later when you visit Granny that you think..."sweet Jesus, what was the old woman smoking when she decorated!" It's like a jumbo box of Crayola crayons just threw up. It's all psychedelic, but not in that funky Bob Marley kind of way. It's more like Jesus Christ himself met some Oompa Loompas and crossed interior design ideas on a TLC home makeover show. Then throw in some doilies randomly scattered about, plus one Clint Eastwood/Dirty Harry painting and you have yourself virtually standing in my Grandma's living room - no joke. I'm not even sure what decade her decorations were stuck in - 30's, 40's, 50's, 60's, 70's? Alright, so maybe you don't have a Granny like that, but I did.

click on thumbnails to enlarge

She has since passed away, but her spirit lives on as being a real character. She was the funniest woman I have ever met, hands down. Everyone always says I get my sense of humor from my Dad, but I also think some of it had to come from her. One thing that I do regret doing is taking her flowers as a kid when I would go to visit. Back then when we brought her a present for Christmas or her birthday, my Mom would usually pick it out and say it was from "the kids". I guess most families are like that given the fact that an 8-year-old boy doesn't necessarily have the largest bank account to be splurging with. However, if I knew then what I know now, it wouldn't of cost me a cent to "brighten up" Granny's house even more than it already was. I'm talking about flowers! What women doesn't love getting them? They are cheerful, bright and full of life (well at least for a few days they are).

Flowers don't always have to be store bought, some of the best are hand picked. Even if the flower doesn't look perfect to give, you can always be creative like me and just use the pedals to add a little extra touch. It shows special effort to take the time selecting a flower for someone. I think women appreciate that more than walking into a store or calling up a florist and saying "uh, a dozen of those red things". I have a huge rose bush in my backyard. Although with the fall season fast on it's way, slowly but surely those roses will be calling it quits until next year arrives. Of course that doesn't mean that there aren't lots of other great flowers around still in bloom. Depending on where you live, you may have to go back to the store pre-packaged ones, but I'm sure it will bring a smile to someone's face just (I mean "almost") the same.

So what about your desktop? Don't neglect it! How about some pretty flowers that NEVER die (not the nasty artificial ones either)? You need something that will cheer you up and throw a little happy into your day. These are a little girly, but for the woman readers of mine, here are a few flowered wallpapers to choose from. It may not exactly be my Grandma's taste when it comes to using flowered wallpaper in her house, but you can give your computer a clean, modern, tack-free new look by displaying one. Unlike my Grandma's house, these wallpapers are just pure/good eye candy. They are all high resolution 1600x1200 images that are splashed with lots of color...just the way Grandma would of wanted it.

Shh, Type Quiet Or I'll Hear Your Password

If spyware and key-logging software weren't a big enough threat to privacy, researchers have figured out a way to eavesdrop on your computer simply by listening to the clicks and clacks of the keyboard. Those seemingly random noises when processed by a computer were translated with up to 96% accuracy according to researchers at the University of California, Berkeley. It's a form of acoustical spying that should raise red flags among computer security and privacy experts. Researchers used several 10-minute audio recordings of people typing away at their keyboards. They then fed the recordings into a computer that used an algorithm to detect subtle differences in the sound as each letter is struck.

On the first run, the computer had an accuracy of about 60% for characters and 20% for words. After spelling and grammar checks were deployed, the accuracy for individual letters jumped to 70% and words to 50%. The software learned to improve as researchers repeatedly fed back the same recordings, using results of spelling and grammar checks as a gauge on correctness. In the end, it could accurately detect 96% of characters and 88% of words. Researchers said there is some limitation to their technique. For one, their work did not take into account the use of a computer mouse or the "shift", "control", "backspace" or "caps lock" keys. Although they did describe approaches for taking those into account. The use of a computer mouse is another challenge. In another similar related study conducted by IBM, 80% of text was recovered from the sound of keyboard clicks. However, the IBM team relied on controlled conditions such as using the same keyboard and training the software with known text and corresponding sound samples.

So really how significant is this study? Well if a group of researchers made up of college professors and computer experts were able to figure this out, it's likely that people with less honorable intentions (like hackers) can - and have - as well. So forget your "quiet click" keyboards, even those aren't quiet enough to bypass this new method of password stealing. In short, the study is a great piece of research. Audio eavesdropping is just one of many possible techniques to spy on PC users. If the bad guys can get access to your physical space, they can eavesdrop on your stuff. They can install a camera or a keyboard logger on the wire. They can install a microphone on virtually any computer system using off-the-shelf equipment. You don't need high-quality audio to accomplish this. A $10 microphone that can be easily purchased in almost any computer supply store will work just fine. The Berkeley researchers will present their results on November 10th at a computer and communications security conference in Alexandria, Va.

Feeling paranoid yet? No? Ok, then bang away at that keyboard because I'm just dying to read your e-mail today! ;)

A Chain Letter Stole My Soul & Ate My Brains

If you are like most people your e-mail inbox gets spam, too many forwarded jokes and of course chain letters. If you are like me, you get that plus too many e-greeting cards playing musical jingles from your Mother. (Sorry Mom, I know you think they are cute and it's fun to send them and I know you mean well, but they are getting a little out of control. How do I explain to the guys sitting beside me in a meeting why I have a bear dancing across my screen singing "Happy Day To You"?) Now I don't know about everyone else, but the second I see any type of chain letter, hoax or e-mail spoof, I don't even bother opening it. I simply delete it. I don't believe in all that superstition. I don't have time to read it and pass it on to 5 other people who then want to kick my ass for sending them it. So when my brother-in-law forwarded me this photo and story (below), would I be another chain letter believing fool or a cursed sole?

My initial impression and response was the same as usual. I saw the FW in the subject line followed by "read story before opening pic FREAKY!!!! Sorry, I hate these things, too." Hmm, really? So if YOU hate receiving these, don't you think I would also hate receiving them? It's ok, he is family and he is a superstitious person that is easily spooked so I let it slide. I didn't read the story, didn't view the photo or pass the e-mail along. For whatever reason I also didn't delete the e-mail. I left it linger in my inbox for about a week. This is where it gets interesting. During the course of the next few days, things weren't really going well for me. Now we can say that is a matter of coincidence, or we could venture into a gray area and say it was because of the letter! That doesn't sound too weird, but how do you explain this...the other night, days before I ever read this chain letter or saw the photo, I had dream with this same girl in it! Are you getting a little freaked out yet? I dream every night so that part is not unusual. I also tend to have a good amount of nightmares, but to have this ghost girl in a nightmare of mine before I ever saw her photo is just really creapy! Just yesterday I opened the letter and viewed the photo. Here is what it said...

This photo was taken in a hospital after the patient in the bed was in an accident where he was responsible for a young woman's death. It is said that when you receive this image and do not send it to at least five people, the woman will look for you during the night to collect your soul. A couple in a western suburbs area of Sydney received the message and deleted the picture without sending it to at least five people. This couple was murdered by their 15 year old neighbor who claims to have been possessed by the woman. A 28 year old woman on Whittlesay Road, Cambridgeshire, England, was run down by a car driven by a another female that fit the description of the woman in the photograph, the police investigation revealed that the murdered lady had received this picture only 4 hours before her untimely death and did not pass it onto at least 5 people. Send it to five people, or the woman will look for you!

Now for the REAL story about this e-mail. I did a little research to send to my brother-in-law and here is what I found...Crafting anecdotes to describe unattributed photos is a popular pastime online. In fact, there are several sites that run contests for the most creative creations. Of course most photo-inspired e-mail tails are created simply for the adventure of seeing how many people you can fool. The text accompanying the decidedly eerie photo varies widely and has been attributed to varied geographic regions from the US, to Australia, to London. Earliest forms of it place the story in Mexico. Sometimes it's simple, others quite complex. The photo is taken from promotional artwork for a Thai horror film, titled "The Mother." The shot being forwarded is cropped down and flipped from the original. As for the "curse" if you don't forward it, well, that's up to you. I could try to research all the locations that the fictional woman's revenge was supposedly carried out, but would that really prove anything? People who honestly believe they will be cursed for not forwarding a chain letter, probably won't be too swayed by what I have to say here.

However, I can't help but wonder why I dreamed about that dead girl. Perhaps my soul is in the process of being stolen since I didn't forward the letter on! Should I do it, is it too late and there's no turning back now that I'm doomed? Maybe me mouthing off to God in that IM session is leading to my inevitable death, or maybe this chain letter just ate my brains and I've turned into a gullible sucker like everyone else. One thing is for certain - break this chain. Remember kids, not only does the Boogie Man live in your closet, but a dead girl is lying under your bed waiting to suck the life out of you while you sleep. Sweet dreams!

Change Is Good

Changing your underwear is good, changing your blog is even better! How about changing your language or learning a new one? Now you can do it on my blog - whoppie! Alright so I'm being a little over excited, which by the way isn't genuine, but it spices this post up. Now for the obvious - I've made some changes to my blog. It's about time, right? I know I've been saying I am going to do it for awhile now but never really found the time to sit down and just make the changes. So in the course of the next few days, I will introduce 5 new changes and additions to my blog.

• Language Translation Tools - Translate my blog into 1 of these 5 more common languages (Español, Deutsche, Français, Italiano, Português).
• IM Post Option - The ability to e-mail a post has always been there, but now I've added the ability to send a post to your buddy via AOL Instant Messenger.
• Extra Links - The changes are subtle here and there, but if you look closely enough, you'll find them.
• Voting Poll Archive - A statistical list of all my past voting poll questions and results.
• New Voting Poll Up - Some of you have already noticed it, but if not, go and vote today!

Remain Silent & Spread 'Em

Picture it - you're driving along and it's late at night. You are tired. Your buddy is drunk and annoying you in the passenger seat. You just want to get home, but it's more than a 2 hour drive to reach home. You crank up the stereo and slide down the window hoping to drown him out and also help wake yourself up. Then out of nowhere red and blue lights flash in your rearview mirror. You look down and realize your foot got a little heavy and you are going over 70 in a 55. Now you are busted - shit. So you pull over and out steps, not a local cop, but a state trooper. Yeah, you are guaranteed to be getting a ticket now. No sweet talking your way out of this one - or for women, crying your way out. Then you see it's a woman cop. Oh great, even worse! Forget about flirting with her to get out of the ticket. Chances are she's a lesbian and will be further agitated by your advances.

Cops in general usually have this "I'm the law/god-like mentality" about them that just rubs me the wrong way. (Sorry if I'm offending anyone here. Note that I say "some" and not "all". There are always exceptions to anything.) They seem especially irritated with younger people who have sporty rides. It's not like I get an attitude with them. On the contrary, I am very nice and polite. I always apologize if I was speeding or was in the wrong in any way. In fact I've apologized even when I felt I did nothing wrong, just to get on their good side, but to no avail. I know they are just doing their job and yes I did break a law, petty it may be, but still I see why speed limits are enforced - I'm not dumb. I just don't know what it is, but usually I come across as a pretty charming guy, or so I'm told. I have no problem meeting new people and making a good impression (well with a few rare exceptions, but that's another tale). I am nearly always able to close a business deal and carry a solid reputation with a client making me an honest and trustworthy character. For the most part, I'm a pretty responsible guy - minus the "bad boy/dare devil" craving that lurks within. Unfortunately for me when it comes to cops, I'm f*cked.

I don't know how everyone else gets out of tickets. I have never been able to - never! It's not like I'm that bad of a driver. I'll admit I do drive fast now and then, but don't we all? So my days were numbered as I knew it was only a matter of time I got pulled over for speeding. Although I've only ever been pulled over 3 times in my life and I have ZERO accidents - not even a small fender bender. Yep, a near perfect record. So you think that would help, right? Nope. First ticket was from a female cop. Second ticket from a male cop, but I told him I hadn't been pulled over for anything in 10 years and have never had an accident! Still, he didn't care and wrote me up a nice hefty $180 ticket. Now the 3rd time being pulled over I am given a $150 ticket and points.

I'm bitter about it, but what can I do? Go and fight it? Forget it. I tried that before and it did nothing. So the way I look at it, there is no point in me taking a day off of work to fight some ticket that I would have to drive over 2 hours both ways just to stand infront of the judge and hear "sorry pal, pay it". Therefore I guess I am going to just bend over and take it up the tailpipe while remaining silent. I can think of alot of other ways to spend $180 than giving it to the f-ing state! In fact I think I will take $180 and invest it in a nice radar detector! Yes, I think I will do that purely out of spite. I have nothing to lose. If I speed and get pulled over again, who cares if I have a radar detector in my car. Technically they are legal in my state, plus I never get out of tickets anyways so f*ck it. Pedal to the metal!

Boobtiful eBay Art

Who likes art around here - show of hands? Now who likes boobs - hands up? Lastly, who likes nude art...correction, boob art? That's right, everyone's hands are in the air now and today is your lucky day boob art lovers! One more question, what do you do when you're a broke college chick with massive DD sized breasts? Answer - either a become stripper, a Hooters waitress or an eBay artist. It seems the first 2 positions were already filled, so this California girl decided a starving artist and broke fashion design college student she would no longer be. She will raise money making boob art and auctioning her work off on eBay!

Taking just paint, paper and her very own "melons", a masterpiece is created! Both paint covered breasts and nipples were dipped and then stroked just the right way to bring out this colorful life-like and one-of-a-kind piece. Careful attention to detail played a factor as well. We all know "twins" are never created equal when it comes to size - one is always bigger than the other and her work reflects that image. Her catchy title for her ad "My boobs painted this! HELP A MILF". I see she's pretty confident in labeling herself a MILF, although I would tend to disagree with that title. Sorry, but to me, she looks better from the chest down. So the self proclaiming MILF had this to say...

YES INDEED MY PERSONAL DD BREASTS
PAINTED THIS 9"x12" CANVAS PAINTING

The original Help a Milf girl is here to stay! I want to go back to school and I thought selling a self portrait may might uplift your day and help my checkbook pay for things I need to go back to Fashion Design school.

FOR THE SAKE OF EBAY THIS IS NOT A CHAIRITY, I AM THE OWNER OF THESE PHOTOS (OF MYSELF). ALL PHOTOS ARE COMPLIANT WITH EBAY & PAYPAL POLICIES Good taste ART. Amaze your friends and have them wondering what exactly this painting is :). This is one of a kind and I appreciate everyone looking. Please help me achieve my goal to get back into Fashion School. Please, serious bidders only and please feel free to ask questions. HAVE A BOOBTIFUL DAY :)

As I write this, the auction is still going and has a total of 11 bids with the highest bidder just over $20. Not exactly the best payout, but hey it's amateur/unknown boob art. What does she expect? Think she will get as famous as Picaso? I'm not holding my breath. If this girl can get $20 for her boob art, I wonder what I could get for my rip off work of the Andy Warhol self portrait? My Mom can be thankful because I'm not desperate enough to make $20 from dipping my dick into purple paint and slapping it on some paper with a "For Sale" sign. (Hmm, although I bet some girls would buy it. Hee-hee.) I guess I shouldn't really "knock" her knocker art. It's not that bad, but it's not that good either. Oh well, good luck to her and maybe for her next piece she would like me to paint on a nice pearl necklace. ;) Now THAT would get some serious bids!

Check out my past posts on crazy eBay auction ads...

• 06/06/05 eBay Human Ad Space Overload
• 08/22/05 Have A Wife With None Of The Responsibly
  

***A Late Parental Warning***
Sometimes there is a slow tech news week and I wonder what I will post about. Then I go to plan B and post about personal things, sports, humor or maybe entertainment, but even then at times I don't feel motivated/inspired to do so. Fortunately, sometimes blogging comes too easy when great material like this pops up. I was going to resist the temptation to blog this because I had a feeling it would get a little over the PG-13 rating around here, but what the hell. Chances are if you didn't get the sex jokes, then I probably didn't cause your underage kiddie any harm reading this. If he did get the jokes, then the damage was done long before he read my blog. Just thought I would let you know.

Hi God, It's Me. Are You Busy?

Has God ever spoke to you? I mean really SPOKE to you? Ever want to talk to the big guy upstairs? Sure you probably have sent prayers up to heaven and waited for an answer, but that can be too time consuming. In today's fast paced world, who has time to wait for a reply...even if it's from the almighty one himself! Well wait no more as I introduce you to the modern wonders of technology. You can now chat with God! That's right, it's a one on one session like IM (Instant Messaging) so no fighting for the big guy's attention in a crowded chat room. Talk to the man himself in private via your computer. He is online 24/7 in spite of the fact that he has massive "To Do" lists piling up. The guy just loves the net, what can I say. Plus who really has big enough balls to tell him to quit surfing the web and get some work done? Ah, not me.

Click Here to Chat with God

Reason #85 why my blogging buddy "EXSENO" kicks ass? She found this link. So props go out to her for the post idea, which I stole and will later need to confess that sin to God in another IM session. Anyway, will we all go to hell for doing this? Perhaps but life is full of risks so go live it up, play along and have some fun before he strikes you down. Shoot the shit, bare your soul, confess your sins, ask for forgiveness, seek guidance, whatever you do - go and chat with God now! He's waiting to hear from you. Then post your witty little conversations in my comment section. Just don't ask him a/s/l check or for his nudes. That would be "sinful".

Now to get everyone started, I'm going to share my conversation with God. Before I contacted him, I had a feeling he would say something like "go away, I'm busy". Hmm, funny because that was pretty much how he opened the talk with me. Read more in my chat log...

Me: what's up big guy?
God: I am chatting with clients on the Internet.
Me: figures
God: Can we get back to business?
Me: are you really "chatting with clients" or are you cybersexing with some weird unknown dude?
God: Why, are you jealous?. Really.
Me: now that you mentioned it, a little yes - lol
God: Is that a fact. What does "it" refer to? I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me: son of a *$#@^ I knew you were just a computer bot and not the REAL God! IMPOSTER!
God: Who is the father? Are you a student?
Me: ok, I'm bored now so I'm ending this chat but before I go, bless EXSENO because she rocks and showed me this site ;)
God: :-) Why not call a friend? I don't judge people.
Me: bye
God: TTYL, .

TTYL (Talk To You Later)? Oh, we shall! I have a bone to pick with you about why J Lo is still married and has yet to call me! I swear sometimes you do the work of the devil - just kidding (gulp).

***UPDATE***
Check out the comment section for 2 more chat logs I had with God - one about masturbation (it's a sin you know) and the other is about a sex concern of mine.

Potty Humor

When nature calls, you must answer it. Even if you remember to relieve yourself before hand, sometimes that just isn't enough and urgency is now upon you. Such is the case for our President. Everyone is getting a kick out of this little note President Bush wrote to the Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice...or as my friends and I refer to her, Cunilinguist Rice. (Yes, we have little boy potty humor, but it's funny though right?) During a very important meeting with other world leaders at the 60th General Assembly of the United Nations in New York, Dubya "passed a note in class". The note was asking permission to go potty. Reuters photographer Rick Wilking was on hand to catch this photo over the President's shoulder.

The note said "I think I may NEED a BATHroom break?" The words "need" and "break" appeared in a thick block script while the other phrase still being written read "Is this possib..." The photographer later commented that he took upwards of 200 pictures during that UN meeting and at first glance he did not find any picture useful. Although his editor just happened to zoom in on this specific photo and couldn't resist sharing the potty humor.

Now before anyone bashes Bush for this, remember his father? In 1989 President Bush (senior) vomited on Japanese Prime Minister Yoshiro Mori’s lap! If only he had asked for a bathroom break too, perhaps that could of been prevented. We don’t want that type of history to repeat itself, or even worse, have Dubya shit his pants! I mean the guy is in enough shit already with the war, Katrina and oh yeah...hating black people. ;)

***UPDATE***
This just in! Cunilinguist Rice passed a note back to Bush asking..."Are you sure Mr. President because you said you THINK you have to go? I don't want to take you there again this time and have it be another false alarm. I told you to go before we left the White House. You never listen. 1 or 2? This meeting blows! I think I will play in PhotoShop. Colin Powell looks kinda cute today. Do you think he would go out with me? Write back." (True story, well the first part of this post was.)

Were My Actions Offensive To Muslims?

As I've said in the past, I like to stay away from the "hot button topics" when it comes to blogging. I've learned that no matter what in life, everyone will always have a strong opinion about issues such as abortion, politics or religion. It's best to stay clear of such topics if you aren't interested in a huge debate unfolding. The fact is that many people may disagree with your viewpoint or may not want to hear how you feel, even if they have no problem expressing their own views. That's just the nature of "hot button topics". For some time now I've been meaning to bring up a question I have concerning Muslims. I am hoping this will NOT cause a huge heated debate on my blog, but only answer some questions I have. I am doing my best to carefully choose my wording here so I don't offend anyone who may misread me. My goal is to see people shed a little light on something that I myself do not fully understand.

I will try to make this tale short so I can get right to the question at hand and give you an opportunity to let me know your thoughts on it. After it is all said and done, I would like to walk away with a better understanding of another culture and perhaps let it inform other people who are also confused like I am. About a month ago I went camping with some friends for the weekend. On the trip back home, needless to say we were beat from all the fun in the sun and starving for some real food other than hotdogs and hamburgers from the grill. So we decided to stop at a place called "Hoss's Steak and Sea House". It's not a fancy place at all. It's just a little sit down family type restaurant where they have a great soup and salad bar along with some pretty tasty dinners for just under $20. It fit what we were looking for perfect. Good food, lots of it and causal attire was a plus given the fact that we were all in shorts and t-shirts (not exactly looking great from being in the woods for 3 days). Anyway, you get the idea.

Now usually when you go to this place, there is a long line of people waiting to sit down. Lucky for our starving stomachs, there was hardly a sole around so we could just go right in. Well as soon as my friends and I began to reach for the front door, we noticed we were rudely cut off by about 7 guys. They appeared to be all related - a father, some sons, and an uncle perhaps. Naturally I was a little annoyed at how they obviously saw we would be seated before them, so they cut infront of us at the door just so they could squeeze by and get in first. My friends and I aren't ones to let people act like assholes to us and get away with it, especially in a restaurant when we are just as hungry if not more than they are. Of course we also weren't going to start a dumb fight. I remember my buddy Mike saying "what the f*ck" loud enough so that they would hear and get the message that they were being rude. I blurted out a nice "excuse you" to them so they would get the message that even if their Mother didn't teach them any manners, then perhaps they should learn some. Of course they didn't care and totally ignored us.

Irritated and hungry, I decided to forget it and I would enjoy my dinner regardless. I happen to glance back out toward the parking lot when we were going thru the door and noticed a car full of Muslim women with some babies and children. It was obvious to me that all them were with the 7 men that had cut infront of us just minutes ago. Although they weren't really "with them" because they were left outside in the 90+ degree sun. They were getting all the babies and children out of the hot car themselves while the men rushed inside to eat and enjoy the cool A/C air. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but from what I see here in the Untied States, Muslim women are treated very different than how I and most other men would treat a woman. From what I see in that culture, the man is made to look "superior" or better than a woman as he will always walk about 10 steps ahead of his wife and their children. The wife/mother is left behind to take care of any babies while her husband walks infront without lending a hand and seeming not to care. Now if that is how their culture is and they like it like that, then so be it. But here in the US, that isn't our culture, or at least that isn't how I treat women - let alone my wife and my own children.

Because I saw these women and all their children (some just newborn babies) struggling to get everyone out of the car and into the restaurant, I thought I would lend them a hand. I didn't do it thinking "hey this is the wife and kids of one of those rude guys that cut me off and if I go up to his family, then perhaps it will piss him off and we could call it even". I walked over to them because they obviously were in need of a helping hand. I asked the women if I could help her with anything. She seemed shocked and a little uneasy. She mumbled something back to me which I couldn't even understand. I wasn't sure if she spoke any English at all. Maybe she just wasn't exactly comfortable with me helping her with the children or me being there at all. They were parked on a slight hill and the car door kept closing on her, so I motioned to her saying "I could hold the door here for you while you get them out". She seem to hesitate either not understanding what I was offering or perhaps because she was reluctant to accept my help. After a brief moment, she nodded to me as to say yes. So I did what she allowed me to do which was to hold the door for her. It was clear to me that is something the males in that family must know nothing about - helping women with the children and holding doors for anyone.

My question is, were my actions offensive to Muslims? If the men in that family would of saw me doing that, would they be upset/angry? Do you think these women and children were even grateful for my assistance or in a way were they bothered by me offering to lend a hand? Lastly, do you think I "scared" them? I say that because you know how some people are scared of other cultures or scared if someone from another race/religion approaches them, well I wonder if this woman felt the same towards me?

Another Round

Artsy shot too pretty not to post.

Expand Your Blog With Multimedia

The 3rd post I ever did on my blog was 01/03/05 Defining Terms - Blog, Blogging, Blogger and Moblogs. As you know a blog is usually produced via a computer using mostly text and photos, but the ability to update your blog via your camera phone (moblog) has been a very popular method as well. The photos you snap with your phone become the content for your blog. Don't ask me why they never called it "photo blogging", they just didn't. It's called moblogging because it's "mobile". Since then, along has come "audio blogging" and "video blogging".

Audio blogging is just what it sounds like. It's a blog post usually produced thru your cell phone. It's done by placing a call into the Blogger service which then is recorded and uploaded to your blog as content. Video blogging works much the same way, except it's video produced from your cell phone. So as you see, blogs aren't limited to their content. Just like a traditional website, you have the ability to produced you very own photos, audio and even video to share with the entire world. Now whether or not anyone cares to see your creations is another story, but at least the option to do so is there for you.

Now the bad news. Blogger does not yet have video blogging abilities setup, but I'm sure in the future they will. Good news is that they already have dedicated pages for anyone with a Blogger account to setup a moblog or audioblog. So if you are interested in expanding your blogging capabilities and beyond, then check out those 2 links. Also, I should note that there are "work arounds" for posting photos, audio and video content to your blog even if you do not have a cell phone that is capable of producing such content. However, that is a little more detailed of an explanation so I will save that technical teaching for a future post of mine. So for now, work with what you got and make it good!

It's A Boy Ya'll!

Britney Spears, who sang "I'm not a girl, not yet a woman", is now a Mommy and she's ecstatic about it. Spears and hubby, Kevin Federline, posted this statement on the singer's website..."We are ecstatic to announce the birth of our son! Everyone is happy, healthy and doing wonderful. Thank you for all your love and well wishes!!" Yes I know, we are all sick of Britney baby talk, but the little monster is now here so I just had to do a post announcing it for those of you not up on this earth shattering news.

The baby was born Wednesday by caesarean section at the UCLA Medical Center in Santa Monica, CA. Federline didn't want to miss the birth of his 3rd child so he was right by Britney's side in the delivery room to dab the cheese doodle dust from her face. Aww, romance at it's finest! No details as to what the baby's weight was, but we do know his name - Preston Michael Spears Federline. The couple initially wanted to name the baby "London" because that is where he was conceived in various public parks while they were together in London, England 9 months ago. However, Britney decided against naming the baby London due to the fact that she associates the name with the city of London, in which she says she didn't care for the dark, warm beer she was served there. Interesting.

Besides releasing a baby into the world who's first word is likely to be "ya'll", Britney Spears also released her new fragrance this week, "Fantasy." Is she really anyone's fantasy anymore? Anyway, she says it was created with all kinds of enchanting scents including "lush red lychee" and even a "hint of cupcakes, white chocolate and jasmine." Some proof I'm not gay...what the hell is "lush red lychee" and is that a food or something like the other scents she has listed? I don't know but if she smelled like cupcakes and chocolate, I would want to eat her. Sorry, bad play on words. Ok, I wouldn't eat her now since Federline came in the picture. Oops, I did it again. Ugh, more double meanings. I'm going to shut up now and end this post before things get really raunchy around here.

Perhaps Britney will use this perfume to help mask the scent of unshowering. I would of thought she would of created a perfume that is more like her - cigarette buts, English pub beer and cheese doodles all mixed with an intoxicating hint of Kevin sweat after a long hard day of not working. Mmm, breathe it in! Wouldn't you buy it? Now that's my fantasy! Some other Britney Spears blog posts of mine...

• 04/14/05 New Member Of The Exclusive MILF Club
• 08/18/05 Oops, She Did It Again

My Amateur PhotoShop Art

I'm not much of an artist and not one to know much about using PhotoShop. That program is DEEP! There is so much to do in it, but for an amateur like me, I tend to just dabble from time to time when I'm bored. Such a bored occasion took place yesterday during one of my work meetings. I simply could not sit and listen to this boring jerk give a presentation any longer. He was about to put me to sleep so I had to do something to appear that I was semi-active in the meeting. I wasn't learning anything new from him, so I decided to teach myself something new - PhotoShop. Behold, my creation!

I like how Andy Warhol did all those portraits with distorted colors. So I did my own self portrait with the same photo I use for my Blogger profile and my AIM account. All the images were created from the original net cam shot which you will see in the middle. Around that is a sketch, negative and other various color combination overlays giving you that psychedelic look. Groovy man!

Like I said, I am an amateur so go kind on critiquing my work here. I know it's not "all that and a bag of chips", but it's at single cheese doodle level at least, right? I hope so. Perhaps during another boring meeting (that I will be zoning out of too), I will perfect my PhotoShop skills and get a little more advanced with some morphs or something to really impress you graphic design pros out there.

***UPDATE***
Blogger has added a new search feature, powered by my favorite search engine - Google. It's called "Blog Search" (fitting title) at http://search.blogger.com It allows you to search blogs all over the web and includes search options and advanced searches which can tailor the info you are looking for to just one specific blog if you so wish. It's still in beta, which means there are bugs to work out, but I gave it a try to see what good dirt I could dig up by doing a vanity search on the name "DIAMONDKT". Try it on your Blogger name.

A Reason

The other day I was reminded of a letter I wrote to someone awhile back one winter morning. I wrote it at a time when I was very in much in love. I didn't think much of the letter when I sent it or even after. Basically it was just me saying what was on my mind and in my heart. However when she mentioned to me that she had once again pulled it out and read it, I was a little surprised. Then I recalled the moment in which I said those words and how I must of felt back then. How happy I must of been. How much I miss the days of having a permanent smile on my face no matter where I went or what I did. It was great! I don't remember how I worded it exactly, but it probably went something like this...

"Morning Sunshine ;) The first thought that popped into my head this morning, even before my eyes were fully open, was you. So I wanted to get up and write you a little note to let you know that I'm thinking about you and miss you already. It's early Saturday morning here and I'm waiting for my heat to kick on since it's so cold out. You are probably tucked nice and cozy in your bed still asleep there. You know how much of morning person I am not, so I'm sure you will appreciate that I left the warmth of my bed comforter just for you. You give me a reason to get up in the morning and I want to thank you for that and for making me so happy. This is just a quick note to say hi, that I'm thinking of you (as always) and of course...I love you."

Now I'm thinking the original letter was a bit more poetic, but from what I recall, it went something like that. The nickname thing was a joke too. I always hated pet names, so the "morning sunshine" was just to be funny/cute. You are probably wondering why I am sharing this letter. Well it's because that is the only thing on my mind right now. I've been really sad and having such a hard time with a few things as of late, that I am simply unable to handle it all. I have asked for some help, but people just don't seem to understand me. So I don't know what to do. Therefore I am trying to remember a time in my life when things were so much better. So the purpose of this post is because "I need a reason now".

Rest assure that I will still do the old blog here and make my humorous little remarks on all of your blogs from time to time because the "clown face" routine is what I probably do best. It's what everyone wants to see. They don't want to see me. This post is the real me. So enjoy the clown because the real me won't be around.

Oh No You D-Int

A rare double post is called for today. In conjunction with the Kanye West's remarks "George Bush hates black people", it's only fair we also scrutinize another man. His name is Wolf Blitzer. He is a CNN reporter who's comment would be getting huge media attention had it not been for Kanye West's little outburst. While a news video tape was rolling some footage of the damage caused by Hurricane Katrina, Wolf Blitzer did his traditional play-by-play commentary. As usual he read partially from a script of facts and figures, but at the same time would adlib to the presentation. However, this time things would be alot different. Blitzer would do the ultimate "insert foot into mouth" stunt as he casually blurted out things running thru his head. He said and I quote... "they are so poor and so black".

Cover your ears, not your eyes!

Ah, what? Did he just say what I thought he said? Surely he must be referring to the fact that the water was making some people muddy = black? No, that wasn't it. He meant exactly what it sounded like. It's hard to cover that blunder and it's even harder to rationalize why he made the comment. Sorry pal, but it looks like you are going to have to live with the backlash on that one. Lucky for you, Kanye West may of overshadowed your KKK mentality. Therefore Kanye is taking more of the media attention (whether good or bad) than Blitzer.

I can just picture Wolf Blitzer trying to leave the CNN studio after a comment like that aired. I bet it was much like Wil Farrell in the movie "Anchor Man" when he signed off the evening news with the phrase "F*ck you San Diego". Like Wil Farrell, Wolf Blitzer probably needed escorted out of the building. Ok, that might be stretching it a bit far, but I'm sure he heard an earful from alot of people...especially when he told a black co-worker that he couldn't drink out of the same water cooler as him in the office! JOKING.

***UPDATE***
By the way, if you got offended by the post title, then you have no sense of humor. It's a joke. It wasn't a dig on how anyone talks. So lighten up if it bothered you. I have black friends and white friends and friends of other "colors". I make that no secret. However if I ever make a "green friend" (an ET), I will keep him a secret. ;)

Please Re-Wire Your Mouth Kanye West

I make a point not to post about politics, religion or race issues on my blog. My reasoning for avoiding such hot button topics is because no matter what your views are on any of those issues, chances are you have some strong opinions and so does everyone else. People will disagree with one another and debate, all of which is normal and perfectly fine. I am just not interested in having my blog host that type of battle. Now with that said, I am not going to get political or racist or anything on this post, but this just irritates me so much that I felt I needed to say a few things. Perhaps some of you may agree with me and perhaps some of you may disagree. The topic on hand - Kanye West's remarks during the Red Cross fund raiser. He claims and I quote..."George Bush doesn't care about black people".

As you probably already know, rapper Kanye West criticized George Bush on live TV during "A Concert For Hurricane Relief". West was presenting a 90-second segment with Mike Myers when during the show the rapper went off script. To the surprise of Myers and the rest of the world, Kanye West took it upon himself to use what was suppose to be a charity fund to raise money for the Hurricane Katrina victims, but instead was used as West's political soapbox. For whatever reason Kanye West decided that he was now the official spokesperson for the black community. He exclaimed: "I hate the way they portray us in the media. If you see a black family, it says they're looting. See a white family, it says they're looking for food." West also claimed that "they have given them permission to go down and shoot us", although he added that "the Red Cross is doing everything they can" only after telling the audience that America is set up "to help the poor, the black people, the less well-off as slow as possible". It was no surprise why West was cut off after his final statement saying "George Bush doesn't care about black people".

An NBC spokeswoman explained the crew was instructed to listen for a curse word and didn't realize West had gone off-script. A later statement added: "Kanye West departed from the scripted comments that were prepared for him and his opinions in no way represent the views of the networks. It would be most unfortunate if the efforts of the artists who participated tonight and the generosity of millions of Americans who are helping those in need are overshadowed by one person's opinion." Although that is exactly what happen. The rapper's comments went out live on the east coast, but fortunately they were cut from the west coast version which was broadcasted three hours later.

What I really have a problem with is not the fact that I disagree with Kanye West's statements, but I can't stand the way in which all celebrities take it upon themselves to either self promote or spew political messages to the public during award shows and now even telethons. Why is it not obvious to the celebrity, when it is obvious to the public, that the reason they are being given that TV time to being with is for a completely different purpose? Take just about any awards show for example. I can't count the times that some singer or actor has grabbed the mic to spew "make love, not war" or "Michael Jackson is innocent" or take just about any hot button topic you can think of. Just leave it to a celeb to go off on a tangent about it. You are up there to accept an award. Accept it, say thanks and get off the stage! I suppose that is asking too much considering that celebrities hardly even live in the REAL world afterall. The ones you see who actually do roll up their sleeves and pitch in to help the world, usually do it for their own benefit - "if I feed a homeless kid, I will look good in the next issue of People magazine" type of attitude.

Kanye West, you have a right to free speech even if some people don't agree with your views, but there is a time and place in which to express them. Not only were your remarks RACIST, unintelligent and uncalled for, but it's unbelievable that you would take that venue as an opportunity to preach your political views. You were asked to help a cause or perhaps you even offered to help the cause. The cause was to raise money for the hurricane victims, but your cause was not the same. Your true intentions were not to aid those suffering from the flooded waters. Your actions did not help them. You were there to get into the limelight so you could publicly bash the President and go off on alot of so called "facts" that you knew little about or could backup. I doubt halfway thru the show you decided in the spur of the moment that you would go off script and preach your political views. I'm sure you knew well before you were on air that you were going to take advantage and misuse your "spokesperson" position on national TV. Yes, you were a spokesperson, but you spoke on the wrong issue. Instead you decided to stand up and act like you were the leader for an entire race - many of which do not even agree with your views. Do us all a favor Kanye, take that backpack of yours, fill it with some books and take yourself back to school. I am beginning to see why your first hit album "The College Dropout" was such a fitting title. As far as that catchy tune "Through The Wire", well you may want to consider re-wiring your mouth shut once again to avoid further embarrassment.

Now, I know everyone is sick of hearing about Hurricane Katrina and you are probably also tired of seeing everyone blog about Kanye West's remarks. I promise this will be the last of both of those things on my blog. Ahh, that felt better. End of my rant.

Controversial Anti-Rape Device Invented

Did you know that 1 out of 3 women will be sexually assaulted sometime during their life? 1 out of 3! That is a staggering high percentage that is both shocking and sickening to me. Come to think of it, I shouldn't say it shocks me considering the fact that off the top of my head I can think of at least 5 women I know who have either been a victim of rape or it was attempted. Now I don't want this post to be about rape. I also don't want to hear bullshit like "well look what she was wearing or she was leading him on". Those excuses infuriate me. Rape is not about sex. It's about power and control. Now that's all I will say on that. Frankly, I hate the topic and it makes me very uneasy. Although I do want to get your thoughts on a controversial new anti-rape device that was introduced the other week called "Rapex".

Rapex, dubbed "the rape trap", is a condom-like device. It's appearance and function are almost medieval in terms of technology with internal hooks designed to snare rapists while in the process of committing the rape. The device, which is worn like a tampon, hooks onto a rapist during penetration and must be surgically removed from the assailant. Painful for the rapist? You better believe it! Although I think a rapist deserves it...and more if you ask me. I have no compassion or sympathy for anyone who rapes or attempts to rape a woman. Nothing will fire me up more than running into one of those scums. So here is the controversy and my question to you...

What is to prevent a woman from misusing this? Let's say you have an ex-girlfriend. For whatever reason the girl is scorned from the relationship breaking up and we all know "hell knows no furry like a woman scorned". So with that in mind, say she has taken her anger for her ex to a new level, to a dark side and beyond. Let's say she lures her ex-boyfriend back in and acts like she wants to sleep with him. It’s consensual and then in the back of her head she is thinking “pay back time asshole” and that thing snaps down on his d*ck! What is to stop people like that from using Rapex (which was meant for a different purpose) to punish and possibly permanently injuring someone who isn't a sex offender, but perhaps just guilty of getting involved with a crazy revengeful chick? Let's be realistic, even though Rapex may be a somewhat simple, clever and very effective idea in theory...do you really think women would get into the habit of wearing this on a regular basis? I doubt it. It's not like you know "when" you would need to wear it. You would need to have it in everyday to really prevent a sexual assault so I don't see this device lowering the 1 out of 3 statistics. So then my next concern is that a woman uses it to get back at an ex. Your thoughts Lorana Bobet?

Remembering 9-11 and Living Without Fear

Today marks the 4th anniversary of the 9-11 attacks. For many, myself included, the images of a commercial airplane flying directly into the side of the Word Trade Center still seem very vivid. As you know the twin towers were already on fire and about to colapse when the second attack occurred just minutes later. Everyone who bared witnessed was still confused as to what exactly was going on. Was this some freak accident? How could this even be happening? It just didn't seem to be real. The reality of it all didn't set in until sometime after the second explosion. Adding to everyone's disbelief, news broke that a 3rd plane was also hijacked and then crashed into the Pentagon as well as a 4th in Pennsylvania. It seemed so surreal and to this day it's still hard to grasp what a tremendous affect it has had on our country - the lives it changed and the lives it took.

This wasn't the first tragedy the world has known and it's also not the first terrorist attack on a country. I'm also sorry to say this will be not be last. Just look back a few months to the London bombings. If anyone thought for a moment that it wasn't terrorist related, you need a reality check. It's not just terrorist attacks either, tragedy comes in the form of Mother Nature as well. The recent Hurricane Katrina disaster is still very much real and impacting lives as we speak. So today on the 4 year anniversary of the 9-11 attacks, take a moment to remember all of those that lost their lives - those in all 4 planes, the WTC, the Pentagon and all of the rescue workers on the scene at ground zero. New York is a great city and Manhattan in particular is one of my favorite places to be. You can't live your life being afraid. I love NY and I would still move there regardless of how much of a "target" it may be in terms of terrorist attacks. You simply can not let the threat of terrorism control your life.

Should I be afraid to fly? Should I be afraid to go to DC or work in the Pentagon when asked? Should I fear moving to The Big Apple? No. As the saying goes...the only thing to fear is fear itself. When you are a kid and you fall of your bike, you pick yourself up and get back on. The same thing should apply to tragedy. Whether it be 9-11 or Hurricane Katrina, you have to push forward and not be afraid to carry on. Let any tragedy or hurdle in your life teach you something. They say without pain in life, there is no growth. Tragedies like these are extremely painful, but from these experiences there is growth and you can't grow if you allow fear to take hold of you.

I Bleed Black & Gold

You know fall is just around the corner when the old pigskin starts getting thrown around. It's that time of year again - football season! For the guys it's one of the best times of the year and for you women, well you will probably be spending alot of Sundays in the mall with your girlfriends. While we are having a tailgate party at the game or even if we opt to stay home and soak in the action from the sofa, you can be getting your leather high from new shoes rather than a Wilson football. Now I shouldn't be sexiest and say that because these days there are alot of women who love football just as much, if sometimes not more, than men do. I think that's great! I have no problem if a woman wants to take in a game with me, just as long as she is routing for my black & gold Steelers or course!

For those that don't know, Pittsburgh is a diehard sports town. People bleed the black and gold colors around here. When the NFL season is in session and you watch the local news, our football team is one of the headline news stories! Yeah, I know that is silly but it's true. I suppose it says alot about how lame the city is otherwise in terms of action. People just love their football around here. Some people are so "crazy" about it that a year ago a Cleveland Browns fan was literally beaten to death in a Pittsburgh bar after he talked trash on the Steelers to some local fans. Now the Browns are our rival enemy, but come on, that is taking your team loyalty a bit far to commit murder! The Browns fan may of not bleed black and gold that night, but you can rest assure knowing that those few crazy Steeler fans no longer wear the black and gold colors...it's more like they wear black and white stripes at the county jail these days.

You don't have to live in the city of Pittsburgh to love the Steelers. In fact Steeler fans are a very loyal group that expand in nearly every US city and state! Go to California and you will find a bar called Sharky's that is a "Steelers bar". It's not just CA either, head over to Cleveland, NY, Washington DC, Chicago, Seattle, Texas, Florida...the list goes on and on. In all of those places and many others, you will find Steeler fans and local bars dedicated to watching the Steeler games. Even in places around the world like Mexico where the #1 sport is usually soccer (or what they refer to as football/soccer), American football and the Steelers are fan favorites.

Since training camp and pre-season are over, it's time to kick off the first real game of the year! This Sunday we host the Tennessee Titans at Heinz Field. My Steelers had the best record in the NFL last year going 15-1 led by rookie QB Ben Roethlisberger, but just missed the Super Bowl. This year's pre-season record they went 3-1 and during the regular season I have high expectations of them repeating last years great performance...with of course the added appearance at the Super Bowl. During the off season we got rid of that lazy ass better known as Plaxico Burress, so for that I am grateful.

However, the sad news is that this year I won't have season tickets (sigh). I did a few years back and they were the best! I didn't get them this season because I've been traveling around alot for work and at times I really don't know what my schedule will be from week to week. Therefore, I don't want to drop all that cash on season tickets and then have to give away the seats because I can't make it to games. That would suck! Going to a Steelers game is nothing like going to any other football game. Even if you aren't a football fan, you can't help but feel the energy in the stadium. That is something I am going to really miss. I am sure I will take in a game or two at the field, but most of the season I'm afraid I will be watching it either from my living room or from another TV somewhere in the world. I'm sure no matter where I travel, there is a place in nearly every city where I can proudly wear my team colors. I can feel at home watching the game surrounded by "out of state" Steeler fans because I know we are all routing for 1 common team and bleed 2 common colors - black and gold!

Now, I just have one question for you...ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL!

My Interview - Uncut, Uncensored, Real and Raw

How about that for a post title? Ha-ha. Maybe it will catch your attention and make you want to read what I had to say when a fellow blogger by the name of Gina Burgess asked if she could interview me. Of course I was flattered at the offer and said sure. Gina had found my blog one day while surfing the net and says she became intrigued in what I posted here, spending an hour just reading what I had to say! Yeah, now there is some love. I'm not sure if I would spend an hour even listening to myself talk. I kid of course, but seriously like many of you that visit my blog on a regular basis, chances are you have an interest in computers stuff too just like Gina does. Although she not only wanted to learn more about what I do, but she also wanted to look a little deeper into "the mystery" of DIAMONDKT". Who am I really? Well you can find out by reading the interview.

My brain was picked on a variety of issues from how I help protect the government from hackers to how the average Joe home computer user can protect themselves...to even some personal things like what was the best advice I was ever given or gave in life to what I look for in a woman - including in the bedroom! Ahh, so now you are intrigued to read right? Perverts all of you. Now Gina's blog sticks with a "Christian theme" so she asked me if it was ok if she omitted some parts of the interview that got a little "dirty". You have to respect that and it's her interview after all, so I am fine with it. Of course, some of you may want to see the full length interview with all that dirt still in there right? Yeah, I thought you would nod your head yes to that. So your wish is my command. Just don't blame me when you burn in hell for your sick twisted ways and the sheer fact you want to read this filth. Ok, it's hardly dirty but still I thought you might enjoy.

It's a lengthy 3 part interview that I broke up into 3 posts.

• My Interview - Geek Speak (Part 1 of 3)
• My Interview - It's A Blog Thing (Part 2 of 3)
• My Interview - DIAMONDKT Exposed (Part 3 of 3)

So if you don't read it all I would understand. Will I be hurt and cry? Yes, I will. Will you go straight to hell for not reading every word I had to say? That is for certain! So you know what the right thing is to do now, so go and do it - read away and give me your thoughts in the comment sections as always. Also please visit Gina's blog and leave her a comment too about my interview which can be found on her site at these 2 links...

• Gina's Blog - The Computer Security Consultant, Diamondkt
• Gina's Blog - The Man, Diamondkt

My Interview - Geek Speak (Part 1 of 3)

Some topics covered include my career as a Network Security Consultant and tips to keep computers, businesses and home users safe online. I felt this section was very education for those of you that want to learn more about computer security and technology in general. I did my best to answer in the most simple and clear terms I could so that everyone could understand no matter what level of computer knowledge they hold. Let the Q and A session begin!


What one thing about computer security would you have computer users understand?

That technology is constantly changing and with that comes the constant need to protect yourself from the numerous amount of security issues facing computers today. It's important to stay informed about things such as viruses, software patches and spyware...but don't be too paranoid. Yes, the Internet can be a dangerous place, although for the average computer user, the chances that a hacker solely targets you is unlikely. A hacker is much more likely to go after a large corporation where the "pot of gold" on the other end is higher than the average Joe's home PC.

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What is the most dangerous, or foolhardy, thing a person can do with their computer regarding security?

Use Windows straight out of the box. Ha-ha, tech joke that many probably won't get. Seriously though, connecting to the net without first turning on a firewall! Even the built-in Windows firewall is better than nothing. If you fail to turn on your firewall and connect to the net for the first time, literally within minutes you will be infected with MSBlast or another virus. That is just a fact and a scary one at that.

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What is the first thing a person should get in the habit of doing to protect their computer?

There are a few things people should get into the habit of doing, but #1 would be to turn on your firewall. Then go to the Windows Update site and download/install the service packs and patches. Next I would install some anti-virus software (I like Norton AntiVirus) and allow it to run in the background to protect you. You may also want to install some anti-spyware software too (I like the free Ad-Aware SE). Lastly use good passwords for your router, Windows login, e-mail and any account you own. A good password should be at least 8 characters long and contain both upper and lower case letters, numbers and symbols. It also should not contain any words that could be found in a dictionary or could be easily tied to you - such as your spouse's name. The more random, the better.

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Is it a good thing to have Windows automatically download updates?

Yes, definitely. By allowing Windows to automatically download updates, it saves you the hassle of going to their site and searching for new patches and fixes. Let your computer do the work for you. Then you can sit back and relax knowing your system is protected.

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There are all kinds of tracking devices out there. Are there any dangers with these? What security level do you recommend with cookies?

Cookies get a bad rap. There are some "bad cookies", but most cookies aren't as harmful as the media plays them out to be. Basically a cookie just saves some preferences for you to speed up your surfing habits. For example, a cookie can hold your username and password for you on a message board. As long as you are the only person who uses that computer, then it's not a security concern. Most people don't realize that no matter where you go online, nearly every site tracks you to some extent. For the average user, I would suggest "medium" security level when it comes to cookies. You will find the option in IE by going to Internet Options and clicking on the Privacy tab.

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What is a day in the life of a computer security consultant like?

It varies from day to day and depends on the client. Some clients require very basic security needs and routine work, while other clients request tighter security and are more demanding. No matter how big or small the client is, the initial consultation service is the same. I'll meet with them, listen to what their problems and needs are, then I'll give my advice on how I can help them. If they like what I have to say, then I will begin putting together a plan of what needs to be done, how often and of course the cost. After we reach an agreement, I get a contract signed and the job begins. What I do is quite different and much more involved than what a typical IT guy does. It is somewhat difficult to sum up or explain, but the best way I know how to say it is that I do reverse engineering. What that means is that I usually work from the outside in. A company may feel their network is secure, but they want to make certain, so they call on me. I will find their weaknesses and security holes for them before a hacker does. I find what needs to be secured or fixed and protect the company from a possible attack in the future. In some cases a company has already fallen victim to an attack, so I am called on to do the clean-up work and prevent a similar situation happening to the company again. Some days can be very stressful, especially when I work for the government. The best part is that everyday there is something new. I love to learn and "outsmart the bad guy". Technology always changes and for me, keeping up with it and ahead of hackers is a fun challenge. It's rewarding to know at the end of the day you may of helped protect a company from losing millions of dollars in damage. Better yet, that you help secure places like the Pentagon. Not too many people can say that at the end of a workday.

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What do you consider the most interesting thing about what you do?

I guess if you are into technology at all, then alot of what I do may be interesting to people. For the average computer user, what I do is probably over their head and I don't mean to say that to sound rude, but it can be confusing and hard to explain to someone who isn't up on all the terms and things of that nature. I'm not sure if this is really "interesting" as much as it is "shocking", but the public would be surprised at what information government keeps on you. It's also surprising to work for some well respected businesses and colleges and find out that they are central servers for kiddie porn rings! It's very disturbing and not something you can just pull someone aside and let them know they are caught and give a reprimanding too. Other interesting/shocking things include the unwavering amount of trust even security companies have in terms of believing that they are "un-hackable". Let me make it clear that there is no such thing as 100% secure. I lost count at the number of businesses that "secure" the most sensitive data with default logins such as admin/password.

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Since the "average hacker" goes after the pot of gold at the big corporations, should we be wary of doing financial business over the internet with our credit card companies and our banks? What precautions should we take with that?

Well I know many people do their banking and other financial business online. However, I don't. I guess when it comes to my banking, mutual funds, stocks, ect I like to do it the old fashion way. It's very sensitive data and being in the line of work that I am in, I have seen so many banks and stock broker agencies get compromised. It doesn't happen that often and usually when it does it only affects a rather small percentage of accounts. Still, one is too many for me to take the risk on. Yes, virtually all of that data is stored on computers somewhere, I just don't want to be punching in my assets from another computer increasing the risk of someone intercepting the information during a transaction. Now that's just me and perhaps I am a little paranoid and overly cautious so it's a personal decision everyone has to make on their own. The risks are slim, but there is always a risk so don't be fooled thinking 100% secure.

Now I do use PayPal for money transactions online such as purchasing something on eBay. I've bought products from numerous sites, both small and large companies and I have never had a problem with my credit card information being misused. I do pay close attention to my credit card and bank statements that I get in the mail and I suggest everyone keep in eye on those to detect any fraudulent use that may occur. It's a good habit to get into whether you pay bills online or offline because cyber criminals may be the new breed of "bad guy", but the good old fashion offline crook still exists too.

To keep safe, only shop with reputable businesses online. Even an online business should be listed with the BBB so if you have any doubt, check with them. Only enter personal information via a website that uses security certificates and encrypts their data. Never give your credit card or other personal information via an e-mail or IM. If you are asked to do that, be aware that you are probably being scammed. Get yourself a PayPal account. They are free , easy to use and widely accepted form of payment on just about every site.

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Without getting too technical, what is the worst thing a virus can do? Since anti-virus software is not 100% effective, is there anything we should beware of contracting viruses?

A virus can do minor to major damage depending on what virus you have. Viruses can be as harmless as just changing your homepage in IE to a porn site or they can be as damaging in terms of erasing your entire hard drive or configuring your computer in a way that allows the hacker total control over your computer. A keylogger is another problem that many viruses carry. A keylogger collects every login (username/password) and every word you type. Some viruses can do so much damage that they can even cause problems with the hardware in your computer - changing the BIOS settings on your motherboard and literally frying your system.

To stay away from viruses, it's a good idea to not download any file online that you know little about. Adult websites and file sharing sites are notorious for being infected with viruses. Stick with reputable websites and only download software from sources you trust.

My Interview - It's A Blog Thing (Part 2 of 3)

In this second part of the interview I discuss my outlook on blogging. What makes for a successful blog and how you can increase your blog's popularity by using some of my own "tricks". This only contains 2 questions so it's the shortest part of the interview, but yet for my fellow bloggers, this may be the most informative in terms of helping them with their own blog.

I have noticed quite a bit of spam advertising in comments on different blogs. Is there anything we can do to prevent this? Is there anything a person can do to Outlook to make sure the real spam goes to the junk email bin and the good emails go to the inbox?

Yes and yes. For some, blog spam has become a real problem. Fortunately for me I have seen little of it on my own blog, but I have seen a ton of it on other blogs. I'm not sure why one person gets hammered with it and another does not, but I'm thinking it has more to do with the post topics. For instance, when I posted about anything medical, I saw my blog getting spam comments about diet pills or sexual enhancement drugs. Now that may just be a coincidence, but spammers in general use bots to send out their messages. Therefore, keywords are selected on a blog to make the spam more "topic specific" and first appear to be a relevant comment when in fact it's nothing more than an annoying form of an advertisement gimmick. Blogger has taken recent measures to help eliminate spam and give bloggers some control of who and how comments can be posted to their blogs. It's called "Word Verification for Comments" and more information can be found at here.

For e-mail spam in Outlook, you can adjust some settings to help filler out the junk. The best spam filter system is done on the network's server which would mean your ISP would need to help you out, but for the sake of your question, we are going to focus on filtering out spam on the users end using just the Outlook program. It can automatically move spam from your Inbox to your Deleted Items folder or to any other folder you specify. Outlook creates a folder called Junk Mail, where you can move junk e-mail and then review it before deleting. Or you can have junk e-mail delivered to your Inbox, but color coded so you can easily identify it. The list of terms that Outlook uses to filter suspected junk e-mail messages can be found in a file named Filters.txt. You can also filter messages based on the e-mail addresses of junk and adult content senders, allowing you to move or delete all future messages from a particular sender. You can review the Junk Senders list and add and remove e-mail addresses from it. For more information on this and the step-by-step instructions, just open Outlook and type in the keyword "spam filter" in the help section of Outlook.

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You have an extremely successful blog. Any advice for us new Bloggers or even for those who have been blogging for a while?

Thanks, but I'm not sure it's as successful as some other blogs. I think the best advice I can give to a new or veteran blogger is...blog because you HAVE something to say, not because you WANT something to say. I see too many blogs with nonsense posts about nothing other than what the person ate for lunch. It doesn't make for good reading material. Personally I am more inclined to read and return to a blog that has some sort of theme or purpose. There are so many blogs out there which are just personal diaries and sometimes that can be entertaining to see, but unless I actually know the person, I tend to not care about their personal trials and tribulations of everyday life. I think you should blog about what you are passionate about. For me that is technology and of course I have other interests that I blog about too, but it really does show when a writer is passionate about what they are talking about. Their enthusiasm and energy comes thru to the reader in their words. That to me makes for a good blog. Plus creative post topics, a little humor and a hidden talent for writing also helps.

One of my own secret trips that I can give people is to link back to other bloggers. Be kind to them and open to their different points of views. You will see they will return that same respect and curtsey to you. I devote a section on my site for every person who stops by my blog and leaves a comment. As a thank you and a way to expand my "blog community", I add a link to their blog. It's also a good way for me to easily find their blog and visit there too. Lastly, keep in mind that it's "quality and not quantity" that makes a successful blog. If you can update your blog daily, that's great but if you feel obligated to post something/anything, then perhaps you are posting too frequently. For me, I never like to make blogging feel like a chore. I do it because I like it and I feel I have something to share. When blogging feels more like work and less like fun to me, then that is the day I quit.