Nothing Says Redneck Like This

The John Deere lawn equipment (movers, tractors and tools) slogan is "Nothing Runs Like A Deere". Well after seeing this photo below, I think nothing says you're a redneck like hanging some fake nuts off the back of your lawnmower. I've also seen people put these on their monster sized pickups and SUVs. I have to say that they are the dumbest and tackiest thing I've seen in a long time! I guess it's suppose to be funny or maybe it's suppose to say "hey look at me I have big balls to go with my ride". No matter what the point of it is or what message they are trying to get across to the public, the only message that I get from it is R-E-D-N-E-C-K. I think putting a bumper sticker on that said "Honk If You Got A Pair" might even be a more classy route to take.


The guy didn't stop with the fake nuts either. Oh no, he went all the way and tricked it out with even a license plate. Hmm, I didn't know you needed a license to ride a lawnmower? Well perhaps you do in the south - sorry to those that live there, harmless jab. You will also notice his fine selection in art as he opted to go with the prestigious naked chick design to grace his tractor. Ahh, good taste is harm to come by, but I'm sure glad this guy is teaching us all a thing or two about what it's like to ride first class. I also can't help but notice how he's so elegantly packed his garage full of trash. What fool uses a garage to park cars in? They just don't make industrial size garbage cans as big as they should. 92 gallon cans of junk just isn't enough room, so thankfully that is what the garage is for - duh. I do bet he finds some room in that mess to store his John Deere though, do you think? Nah, he probably just pulls it along side the 3 old broken down Fords up on blocks in his yard.

The only thing that is missing is the coveted "Back Off" mud flaps with Yosemite Sam. I'm sure that is on the way for his next mower mod. Maybe he will throw on a few bumper stickers also. I'm thinking something like "How's My Mowing? Call 1-800-KissMyAss" or the ultimate redneck slogan "Get 'Er Done". It took me awhile to even know what the hell that meant until someone told me there is a redneck comedian that uses that phrase. One last thing, is that just dead grass or is that manor on his tires?