Have The Carpet Match The Drapes

Bottled blondes take note because the gig is up! You may have your girlfriends fooled by telling them you are a natural blonde, but we guys know the truth. And just how do we discover that truth? Well I shouldn’t need to explain that, but sooner or later, we will find out whether the carpet matches the drapes. Of course if you have a silky, smooth, hair-free playing field (mmm), I’ll just have to take your word for it that it matches, not that I really care if it matches or not. I’m too focused on "other activities" to be concerned if you are a few shades off. Now for those of you who have 70s bush, I’m not even speaking to you because you should be ashamed. Cleanup the hedge. Buzz it down. Wax it up. Install a landing strip. Anything. Just go groom! I’m a guy and I even manscape. I know, I know. TMI.

I thought I had seen it all, until I saw an ad for pubic hair dye on a NYC subway. (You just gotta love NYC for endless blogging material.) "Betty Beauty" is the name of the company manufacturing the pubic hair dye. They claim they are "color for the hair down there" and they are boldly going where no color has ever gone before. Apparently it’s been around for 2 years, but this is the first time I ever heard of it. Then again, I no longer subscribe to Pubic Hair Weekly magazine – hottest trends in little curly hair fashion.

Intimate grooming products are not normally advertised on the subway, but the ads make only oblique references to pubic hair. The ad shows boxes (no pun intended) of the product in the five available colors - black, blond, auburn, brown and "fun"...AKA hot pink. So if you are a redhead and you are tired of the verbal abuse of being called a "fire crotch", you don’t have to take it anymore. You can choose to be any color you like from jet black to platinum blonde! No matter what color you choose, each box (again, no pun intended) has a sketched torso with a wispy, carefully placed triangle in the relevant color. The ad campaign reflects the balance between noting the growing attention to grooming a particularly private area of the body and the desire to avoid the use of any language that could be interpreted as crude or misogynistic. (I know, I just used a big word, but go look it up if you don't know what it means.)

"We knew we wanted a catchy tag line that wasn’t going to be too risqué, but would make it acceptable," said Nancy Jarecki, the founder of the company. Ms. Jarecki said she was inspired to create Betty Beauty in 2006, after seeing the small sample bags of coloring given out at salons in Rome so women could make their hair "match" in the privacy of their homes. Perhaps this is how the question "does the carpet match the drapes" came about?

As for the other question on some of your minds, the company says it doesn't come off if you engage in any sort of physical activity. And yes, Betty is edible. Good to know!

Hey, is anyone else thinking I should have a blog label/category titled Va-Jay-Jay? I seem to be posting about a woman's naughty place an awful lot lately. Sorry, I can't help it. It's my favorite place to visit and stay awhile so I tend to write about things I love. I say this as I'm devouring a fresh ripened peach whose juice just hit my laptop keyboard. Coincidence? I think not.