Bigfoot Corpse Found, Fur Real?

A couple of Southerners had a press conference today to discuss their "discovery" of the legendary Bigfoot, a Bigfoot corpse stuffed in a freezer to be exact. The only problem, they didn't want to show the actual body! Um hmm. Mathew Whitton and Rick Dyer showed two photos (body and dental) of the alleged dead Sasquatch they found in the northern Georgia woods while hiking, but denied assembled reporters access to the corpse until "scientists" could examine it. Whitton and Dyer say they have proof once and for all that Bigfoot exists. However, they don’t seem very willing to share this "proof" with the public. I think I speak for everyone when I say that we want to see the actual body! Not just photos OF the supposed body.

Along with the photos and body, DNA evidence was also to be presented. But just like the body, they didn’t fully deliver on that DNA promise either. The men presented an e-mail from the University of Minnesota reporting the three distinct DNA sequences that showed up. One was inconclusive, one was human and the third was from a possum. It could be from a possum snack or it could be from throwing the guts of a dead possum onto a Halloween custom? However, they were eager to share a whole slew of measurements, which of course can be completely fictional and most likely are. These were taken from their website, SearchingForBigfoot.com

~ 7'7, Male
~ Weighs over 500lbs
~ Creature looks like it is part human and part ape-like
~ Has reddish hair, blackish-grey eyes
~ 2 arms, 2 legs, 5 fingers on each hand and 5 toes on each foot
~ Feet are flat and similar to human feet
~ Feet are 16 ¾ inches long, 5 ¾ inches wide at the heel
~ Hands are 11 ¾ inches long, 6 ¼ inches wide
~ Walks upright (several sighted on the same day the body was found)
~ Teeth are more human-like than ape-like

Not so fast say some who are calling out these two as hoaxters, saying their animal is nothing more than a Halloween costume topped with animal entrails. So is it or isn’t it? Reports are coming in that this is an ongoing hoax being orchestrated by a notorious con-man named Carmine Thomas Biscardi. Biscardi is no stranger to controversy. He pulled a very similar Bigfoot body hoax back in 2005 before finally confessing he made the whole thing up. Obviously a great amount of credibility is now lost. I think something stinks...and it isn’t that big, hairy monkey in the cooler.

I investigated into exactly how two men pulled this 7’7, 500lbs Bigfoot out of the woods. They say they towed him out with a truck. Ok, I guess that sounds responsible, if you could even get a truck thru thick woods, but let’s just say they did. Now this is the part that makes me scream "BULLSHIT!" The men claim that as they were loading the dead Bigfoot in their truck, three other alive Bigfoots watched on from nearby! So what does nearby mean – within 10 feet, a couple hundred yards? No matter what the exact distance was, let’s be realistic here and think for a second. If you and a friend were deep in the woods and stumbled upon the dead body of a Bigfoot, would you really mess with the carcus if you saw three of his 7’7, 500lbs friends watching you nearby? No, you would get the fuck out of there and fast! You wouldn’t stand there poking their dead pal with a stick and fumbling around loading him into your truck.

So I’ll let you decide. Bigfoot or bullshit?

Related post of interest...
10/2/07 - Bigfoot Spotted Where I Go Camping!