Monday, April 24, 2006

On Any Given Day, It Can All Be Taken Away

You may not want to read this post. It may upset you. In a way, I want it to shake you. It needs to rock you to the core. To hit home. Like being struck by a bolt of lightning, followed by a thunderous boom of thunder. Pain that rains down on top of you like an unrelentless storm. Only then would you truly feel it. To really get the message. A message sent that is so powerful, it absolves your mind of whatever problems, small or big, that are ailing you at this very moment. The message that on any given day, it can all be taken away. A message that may not reach inside you with just my words, but perhaps sharing this story will be enough for you to visualize yourself in someone else's shoes. Crisp white tennis shoes. You squat down, sinking into the thick green grass. The warmth of the sun shines across your back. You are happily working in your front yard planting flowers. Sowing the seeds of life. You don't have a care in the world. Life is good. Life is happy. Life is perfect.

You married your college sweetheart. Your best friend. You built a life together. Together, you endured the good and the bad. Together, you struggled with trying to have children. Finally thru In Vitro Fertilization, together you conceive. Not just 1 baby, but triplets! Three seeds sown. Together, you are ecstatic. Together, you feel blessed. Three beautiful children emerge in this world. A daughter and 2 sons. Together, you now have a family. Together you promise to always care for, love and protect one another for life. Together. Forever. The way it was meant to be.

The only thought on your mind is if it's too early to be planting flowers. You question if a late frost will emerge in mid April. You would hate for your beautiful flowers to die. You hope they will be safe so you can watch them grow each day. So you can admire the work you put into caring for them. See them bloom before your very eyes. Bask in the smile that emerges on your face when the thought of them crosses your mind. What joy they have brought to your life. A simple pleasure. Life - a precious gift.

A car pulls into your driveway and everything that follows is just a blur. A nightmare you can't bare. You collapse to your knees in disbelief. The shock. The overwhelming grief. It's just too much to handle. This can't be happening. There has to be a mistake. Surely you must have the wrong family. The reality, there is no mistake. This is the right family. This isn't a sick joke. It's all real. It happened. You can't wakeup from a nightmare when you aren't sleeping. You are living it. A future that once seemed so full and bright, is now very bleak and black. Someone has come to tell you that every life you hold dear to your heart has been ripped away from you. A horrific accident has taken place involving your husband and all of the 4-year-old triplets. Your husband, your only daughter and one of your sons were killed instantly. The only family member you have left is the one boy. However, he is in critical condition. He suffered major injuries. Head trauma that will require extensive surgery. If he is to pull thru, he may have to live with brain damage for the rest of his life.

It's hard to fathom what this must be like, but I know this family. I watched the story play out on the news like a bad movie. I listened to reporters recount the events. I saw the police cover the family's van with a giant tarp. The scene was that gruesome. A freak accident as a 5,000lbs wood chipper dislodged from a truck, striking the family's mini van with such force, it was severed in two! It's remarkable that there is a sole survivor. When I hear things like this happening, it makes me question if there is a God. I'm not a deeply religious person, but if there is some type of higher power, how could he/she let this happen? There is a saying "God will never place upon you more than you can handle". Well if that is true, God must think this Mother is the strongest person on Earth.

I pray that her sole surviving son pulls thru. I can't even attempt to comprehend the unbelievable pain she must be facing right now. Her entire family is gone in an instant. Her world turned upside down in the blink of an eye. Blindsided in every sense of the word. The only thing more heartbreaking than to see a casket accompanied by 2 small childrens caskets, is seeing a sole casket, knowing both 4-year-olds are tucked on either side of their father. I have the utmost compassion for the Mother. Sometimes terrible events need to take place for us to appreciate life. To realize that the people we love can be here today and gone tomorrow. If you take nothing else away from this story, please learn this...

Make sure you have no regrets because you or someone you love may leave this Earth at any given second. Tell them how much they mean to you. Hold nothing back. Because one day it could be too late to tell them. One day it will be too late to kiss their forehead and say I love you. One day you may have to hold it all inside. A down pouring rain that never succumbs. I hope her pain washes away, but I fear that she may drown in her own tears.

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