Redefining - "Beating The Sh*t Out Someone"

What are your feelings on dirty underwear? You’re probably not cool with it, right? And I’m not talking about your own dirty laundry. I’m talking about other people’s soiled briefs, boxers, panties, bras, gym socks, jock straps and more. Skid marks belonging to total strangers. Grossed out yet? Now imagine stinky, sweaty, filthy undergarments shoved in a bag and sold to you for top dollar! No, this is not some type of weird fetish specialty shop. This is Costco.

Rumor has it that the wholesale warehouse, Costco, is selling a punching bag that is filled with dirty underwear! Slice one of these bags open and what pours out will amaze you! Once this news gained media attention, Costco had to take a stance. Apparently, they’re not cool with underwear-filled punching bags either. This statement was taken from Costco’s website …

“We are issuing this voluntary recall notice for the TKO Sports Heavy Punching Bag with Speed Bag Combination, manufactured by TKO Sports, of Houston, TX. We have learned that the fill material in the heavy punching bag does not meet our high quality standards.”

Yeah, that's quite the understatement. If Costco's records reflect that you've purchased this bag, they're sending a box and UPS shipping label out to you right away. They're also sending you an Everlast punching bag (which in my boxing opinion is a far superior company) to replace the TKO one that is filled with used underwear.

Is there anything that would make this post any less gross? Maybe if it was not-so-used underwear punching bags? And who did they hire to pack the bags? Where did they get the underwear? Do these drawers belong to Texans, and if so, are there buttless chaps shoved in the bags as well? These are the unanswerable questions, or rather, I'd just prefer that they were not answered. If nothing else, this will make you think twice about the store where you can purchase ground beef and just two isles over you can pick up a new set of truck tires. Something just doesn’t seem right when you look at it that way.

Furthermore, it’s been brought to my attention that this recall is from June 23, 2005 and Costco has been on top of the dirty underwear punching bag epidemic for years! However, they’ve failed to do anything about it until now. Disgusting, in every sense of the word.