Perseverance

What do you do if you have a dream, but everyone around you keeps telling you to be more realistic and to give up the dream? What if they want you to pursue a more “sensible” and traditional career route? You ignore them. You shut out the naysayers and you stay focused on your dream. It’s the only way. There will always be negative people. So we will always have naysayers. If you listen to them, you will never pursue your dreams and you will never follow your heart. Therefore, you will never be truly happy. And I can’t think of a greater tragedy in life than never pursuing one’s dream. To never follow your heart. To never experience happiness that comes from deep within your soul. A life left with unfulfilled dreams is not a life I would ever want to lead, nor be remembered for. So how do you make your dream a reality?

Perseverance is meeting an obstacle in life, an immovable rock,
climbing over it and carrying on.

First, you need to have a dream. Second, you need to want the dream bad enough that you are willing to take a risk, to take a chance at changing your life. You have to believe that achieving your dream is completely within your grasp. You need to stay true to yourself and stay motivated. But yet, you have doubts, because dreams such as yours are not considered realistic. Doubts hold even the best of us back. If you remember nothing else I say, remember this, doubt is the enemy. We all have doubts and they’re unavoidable. Sometimes it’s good to be realistic because you need to be able to analyze whether a dream is achievable or not. But if the only thing stopping you is fears and doubts, and not some insurmountable obstacle, then you need to banish those fears and doubts.

A doubt, as innocuous as it may seem at first, has a way of creeping its way into your subconscious. It has a way of worming itself into the depths of your heart, like some kind of black cancer that has infiltrated your body. The doubt lingers in the back of your head, gnawing. And without warning, it will eventually conquer your dreams. When you think about yourself, your self-image will not be of that person you want to be, but the person that others want you to be. And never underestimate the importance of passion in life. It fuels a dream like nothing else. If you are lacking in passion, you are probably also lacking in inspiration. So get inspired. Inspiration is one of the keys to achieving any dream.

Doubts will keep you in a job and in a town you hate, just because you’re afraid to go do what you really want to do. Doubts will keep you in a crappy relationship because you don’t think you deserve better. The good news is that you can banish doubts. Imagine that the doubt is an ugly little bug. Now step on it and squash it with the bottom of your shoe. Exterminate it. Do not let it live and spread! Replace it with positive thinking. When it comes to the external negative factors, the naysayers, you have to learn to block them out. Or if you’re like me, you have a contrarian streak in you. The naysayers only fuel my determination to succeed and prove them all wrong!

So you’re passionate. You’re inspired. You’ve blocked out the naysayers. You’ve squashed your doubts and you’re ready to pursue your dreams, but there is only one problem - you’re afraid to take the plunge. The best advice I can give you is to imagine that you need to swim out to a boat on a lake. You’re standing on the dock, looking down at the icy cold water. You are afraid to dive into that water, but you know you need to take that plunge to get to your boat. So how do you do it? Do you go in one toe at a time? Do you stand there for awhile, waiting for the right moment? Do you wait for someone to give you a push? No. You just do it. You just dive in!

Once you’re in, it’ll be freezing, but you’re in. You’ve already committed to it and that makes you more likely to achieve your dreams. You now have no choice but to swim to the boat. And once you’ve gotten to the boat, you’ll be glad you took that plunge. That’s how it is with your dreams. You can’t wait for the right moment to come along, or for someone to give you a push, or for the lake to warm up. You just have to dive right in. Keep in mind that motivation comes in waves and it’s impossible to keep it high all the time. Obstacles are sure to come up, but you need to be a strong swimmer in the face of adversity. Plan it out. Do your research and when you’re ready, dive in and don’t look back. There is no better time than the present to test the waters.

This is the pursuit of happiness.

Oprah Made Me Cry

It’s a subject that no one wants to talk about, but if affects every one of us. If you knew you were dying, how would you spend your time? What would you say to the people you love? How would you live?

It’s frightening and really difficult to talk about, so I’ve decided to write about it. It’s death. Or rather living. When you look at it as “living your life”, the topic becomes less scary and much more inspiring. The most inspiring man I know is Randy Pausch. He is one of my CMU professors, as well as a married father of three. To put it rather bluntly, he is dying. He has pancreatic cancer and has been given just months to live. However, this post isn’t about death and it isn’t about cancer. It’s about life. It’s about living. It’s about living your life to the fullest and looking back with no regrets - realizing the biggest regrets are not of things you did, but things you didn’t do. And it’s about how his recent appearance on the Oprah show brought me to tears, literally.

(His speech is in the first 10 minutes of the show.)

I feel honored to know him and blessed to have been taught by him as a graduate student. Saying that I admire him is quite an understatement. Randy Pausch has inspired me with not just his words, but with the way he has chosen to live his life. So yes, Oprah made me cry, or rather Dr. Pausch’s “Last Lecture” Reprise did. It is a little embarrassing to admit I actually watched an episode of Oprah, let alone cried during it. However, I’m willing to let the world know my professor brought me to tears in hopes that it will reinforce just how important his speech is to hear. What a profound impact it had, not just on me, but by the millions of people who have now heard it. It’s literally life changing and I feel it’s imperative that I share it with you.

When I think of Dr. Pausch, I think of someone that delivers valuable, powerful lessons in the simplest of terms. “Brick walls are there for a reason, they let us prove how badly we want things.” “If you live your life the right way, the karma will take care of itself, and the dreams will come to you.” I love his outlook on so many things and find myself being able to relate to him on so many different levels, like when he suggested that parents should let their kids paint on the walls. His parents allowed him to express his creativity, drawing whatever he wanted on his bedroom walls. I would have loved if my parents would have given me permission to do that! Growing up, I told myself that one day when I have kids, I would paint their bedroom walls with chalkboard paint. So in the middle of the night when they brainstorm up the cure for AIDS and cancer, they will have somewhere to jot down the algorithm. Or if they just need a creative outlet to scribble a silly face, that would be ok by me too.

Pull out the fine China tonight and eat your grilled cheese sandwich on it. Slip into an outfit you have stashed in the back of your closet, saving for a special occasion. Toss around that autographed NFL football that is encased in an air-tight display case. What are you waiting for? Live today because you never know if you will be around tomorrow to enjoy life's simple joys.

Leonardo da Vinci once said “As a well-spent day brings happy sleep, so life well used brings happy death.” It’s a beautiful sentiment and a very famous quote from one of the world’s most historic figures. Although, a message attached to a framed family photo resides with me stronger. It rests on the mantle of my fireplace, etched are the words…“Live Well, Love Much, Laugh Often.”

Nothing could be more true and I think the good professor would agree.

Memorandum

Sometimes I think the only person who reads my blog is Vinnie, my 4th cousin who is twice removed. I’m not even sure what that means, but if I actually had a cousin named Vinnie, then I bet he would hold a title like that. As you can see, this post is leading to nowhere. You could say it’s a rather pointless post. However I’m writing this short note to inform those of you who do read my blog, besides Vinnie, that I’m sorry.

I’m sorry I’m lacking in creative juices lately. I’m sorry I’ve slacked in my regular posting habits. You see, the two go hand-in-hand. You just can’t have good writing without creativity. And what would a blog be without good creative writing? It would be mine – a bore.

Believe me, the content is there. Coming up with topics to write on has never been a struggle for me. The real problem is…well that’s just it, I can’t write about the “real problem”. And why is that? Why is it that the things we need so desperately to get out in the open are the very same things we close up about and hold inside ourselves?

So as the internal battle rages on, I hope to numb my mind to it long enough to allow the creative juices to flow freely again. And when they do, that is when I will put pen to paper, or rather fingertips to keys. Stick with me. I’ll pull thru and return to my bloggy ways one of these days.

Better Than Sliced Bread

Think of it as God's gift to consumers. It's perhaps one of the best inventions since sliced bread. No, it’s not the Flowbee or The Clapper. Those are both piss poor products if you ask me. This is something much cooler. Something 10x better. Something as useful as the jockstrap and as multipurpose as the Swiss Army knife. It’s as universal as the remote control and “almost” as awesome as the iPhone. You may want to sit down to prepare for this news as I proudly introduce the Dual Bladed EZ Clam Shell Opener.

Huh what’s that, you say. Well basically it’s a little gadget that allows you to effortlessly open plastic clam shells. You know those annoying vacuum sealed packages that everything under the sun comes in. Those plastic packages which are so freaking airtight that not even an angry grizzly bear could tear into if his life depended on it. In the past, I’ve bloodied my fingers and teeth trying to open them. That was before I resorted to stabbing it with a butcher knife in a Psycho shower scene reenactment.

Not only is the Dual Bladed EZ Clam Shell Opener my dream come true, but it’s also the answer to all my problems and questions, except this one…now why couldn’t I think of that?

I would be sitting pretty as a multi-millionaire if I had. Damn this unclever brain of mine.

iArt

Ever wonder what an exploded iPod would look like incased in a giant block of ice? Probably not, but now you don’t have to wonder anymore (even if you never wondered in the first place). The iPod has become the Kleenex of the mp3 players and despite its rather subtle cosmetic facelifts thru the years, the iPod has never looked this cool!

This rather refreshing view was created by dissecting an iPod and dumping resin all over it. I refer to it as “iArt”. And this isn’t just for pretty, it’s fully functional too. The internals of the dock are embedded on the bottom. This allows you to control it, charge it and of course listen to it. The Legos attached to the bottom act as support legs for the standing cube.

The little bubbles you see actually occurred by accident. Originally the artist intended for the piece to be smooth and flawless like glass. However, the air pockets found their way in during a mistake pour of resin. Personally, I like the serendipitous addition.

See more of this artist’s work at BillyChasen.com

The Dirty Little Secrets You Can’t Speak Of

She had enough. She broke down and had to confide in someone. She wanted it to have a voice. She needed to be that voice. So she said it. She shared it. She let it all out and then some. I expected it. I could see it coming, but to the degree in which she dealt with it, oh no I didn’t see THAT coming! It was like something from a Hollywood script. I thought people’s lives were only like this in the movies? Apparently not. This is real life. Real drama. Real everything filled with sex, love, money and an almost murder!

Every family has a few, the dirty little secrets you can’t speak of. The dirty little secrets you find out about, but swear on your life or the life of a loved one that they won’t ever leave the room in which they were aired. These four walls aren’t talking. My word is good. Your secret is always safe with me. I don’t just say this. I mean this. And those that know me well know this to be true. It’s why my sister has nicknamed me “The Vault”. Entrust your verbal valuables with me and within me is where they will stay. I’ll lock them down, tuck them away and throw away the key. That is how much value I give to the secret after someone confides in me. The Vault provides top notch security like no other.

Most of us do everything in our power to see to it that our dirty laundry is never aired, but everyone knows of its existence, even if we deny it has life. Its presence is known even if it is never fully seen or validated with a voice. We are aware of its unspoken truth. The scent of it lingers in a chilling breeze. It exists behind a closed door and it grows uglier in the darkness of the night. When a secret is revealed, you are either shocked and left in disbelief, or you have been expecting it and play the semi-surprised award winning actor/actress role.

No matter what your reaction is and no matter how long it takes a secret to revel itself, there is always a sense of relief. Relief that it’s out in the open. Relief that now it can be dealt with head on so we can put it behind us and move forward. Just relief. It is at the very moment, in which we share that first sense of relief that the healing process begins. And I vowed to help her breathe.

My Childhood Dream Is Finally Coming True

I just wanted to thank everyone who had e-mailed me after reading my post from 10/27/07 - 20 Years Later & I Still Want Him Sooo Bad! I was surprised and rather touched to discover that even total strangers wanted to make my childhood dream become a reality. I received many helpful tips and links from people trying to help me locate a vintage 1986 My Pet Monster from Amtoy/American Greetings. The search wasn’t always easy, but I was diligent in my quest to find the most perfect My Pet Monster that could be had. Today I can say, mission accomplished - My Pet Monster is on his way!

Actual photo used in eBay acution. Notice his tip-top condition!

It may have taken 20 years, but my childhood dream is finally coming true! My very own Pet Monster will be arriving at my doorstep any day now and I can hardly wait, seriously. I feel like a kid on Christmas morning. I very well may clap my hands and march around my living room singing “Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy” once I lay eyes on that big brown shipping box and allow my fingertips to graze the dirty cardboard fibers. My imagination may be getting the best of me, but I picture him breaking out of the box on his own!

I wanted to find one that hadn’t been previously “loved”, NIB (New In Box), but I soon realized how rare those are. They are basically impossible to find! So I settled on a near mint condition one I found on eBay from the UK. I had to convert pounds to dollars, but it was worth it. The auction had barely begun, just 1 hour in, before I snagged up this guy. And if you want to know if he will sleep with me the first night, the answer is probably yes. After that though, he will most likely go up on a pedestal (AKA, top book shelf) in my home office to admire in aww. The way I see it, he’s almost God-like…or at least that is how I saw him as a kid. And let's face it, I'm still a kid at heart even today, so he still holds that God-like status to me.

I’m not sure if he talks, he should and I’m hoping he does. If he doesn’t, it would be a letdown, but regardless he will still retain his awesomeness! I do know that he comes with his original breakaway orange handcuffs. Gotta have the chains and cuffs! It’s his best feature. Besides, how else do you keep a monster under control?

Bigfoot Spotted Where I Go Camping!

Legend has it that he's large, hairy and hard to find. No, I’m not talking about your dream date. I’m talking about the one and only Bigfoot! According to one Pennsylvania hunter, Bigfoot is out there…and he has the pictures to prove it! He claims he spotted Bigfoot 115 miles north of the city of Pittsburgh. (Which makes me wonder, think Bigfoot is a Steelers fan?) Rick Jacobs believes he has captured photos of Bigfoot. He saw the creature from a tree stand in the Allegheny National Forest. Jacobs was hoping to get shots of deer, but this is what he saw instead.

Take a closer look. Click to enlarge photos.

Personally, I’m having trouble making heads or tails out of it. Seriously, am I looking at his ass in the one photo or is that his face? It looks like he’s attempting a headstand, either that or he’s super butt-ugly! I’m never really sure if it’s “of Bigfoot” or “a Bigfoot”. Is there just one Bigfoot or are there several Bigfoots? And wouldn’t the proper term be Bigfeet, plural for Bigfoot? I don’t know. There probably aren’t any at all so this is a useless argument.

Although, to many, this is a hot topic and experts are weighing in. Is it or isn’t it Bigfoot? According to the Bigfoot Research Organization, the picture could be a juvenile Sasquatch. However, the Pennsylvania Game Commission says they're pretty sure it's just a bear with a bad case of mange. As the debate continues as to what the animal is, Jacobs said he can't release the exact location of his potential find because the Bigfoot organization is worried people will destroy the animal's habitat. Or maybe find out the hunter is full of complete shit?

I say whatever it is, I bet it smells really bad! And I don’t care to see or smell him when I’m roasting weenies and making Smores over my campfire. So how about taking a hike, you mangy whatever you are.

What do you think? Is it or isn’t it Bigfoot? And does a real Bigfoot even exist?

Scary Vagina

I take pride in the amount of creativity I put into my Halloween costumes. I think one of my most memorable costumes ideas was in college when I gathered my fraternity brothers together and we dressed up like a box of Multi Pack Tampax Tampons. Depending on each guy’s body type, he was assigned to portray a specific Tampon – light, regular and heavy flow. I was mid cycle, regular absorbency. Our bodies were tightly wrapped in a white foam/cotton-like material, complete with the cord on our head. We then segregated the light, regular and heavy flow tampons by sectioning ourselves off in a makshift Tampax box constructed out of giant cardboard walls. There we stood on the front lawn of our fraternity house. We would yell obscenities and insults at those who passed by to simulate the feeling of PMS. It felt kind of good to act like a bitch and use PMS as an excuse.

Watching a heavy flow tampon do a keg stand remains as one of my fondest college memories. Now I don’t know about blood, but I can attest to the fact that tampons absorb Yuengling beer surpringly well! That year we took home first prize, “Best Costume”, in the annual Halloween campus parade. I’m relieved to say it’s not my most noteworthy college achievement, but it does rank right up there in terms of pride.

Besides playing the role of a bitch, I also played the role of a dickhead (I’m sure I’ve played the role of a “dickhead” on other days besides Oct 31, but you get the idea). One year a friend of mine and I decided to dress as a pussy and dick. Since I was taller than him, I opted to go as the dick, because we all know a big dick is better than a little dick, right? However, never did I seem to put the two Halloween costume ideas together like this guy (see above photo) did and pull off one the most offensive/humorous costumes I’ve seen in a long time. You can’t really see it from the photo, but he was in desperate need of a bikini wax! And just for the record, that vagina scares me!

This year, I had little time to put together a good Halloween party costume. So I went as a pimp and my date was my ho. I must say “my kinda sorta not really girlfriend” makes one smoking hot ho! We considered doing role reversal, me being the ho and her being the pimp, but not even my arm could fit into her miniskirt. Besides, I just don’t have the legs for it.

Now my niece is only 3-years-old and I can’t show up to surprise her dressed as a pimp, so I went as a dust bunny. I put on pink bunny ears and stuck dryer lint to my clothes = dust bunny. Of course, it would have helped if she actually knew what a dust bunny was. Oh well, Halloween was fun regardless.

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