I'm a man of lists. To-Do lists, shopping lists, idea lists, lists of lists to be made (not a joke). Lists are good. They keep us organized and focused by prioritizing tasks and breaking down work loads into small manageable chunks. They help us set goals and push us to accomplish those goals. They're simply handy and effective. Although for some, they're simply a catalyst for anxiety - a daunting reminder of all that we have yet to do in a small window of time that is constantly shrinking by the minute! (Just writing that sentence caused my chest to tighten.)
If you're like most people, you have have two lists going on any given day - a To-Do List for work and a To-Do List for home. And if you're like most bloggers, you have two more lists - a 101 Things You Didn't Know About Me list and a Life List. Notice there is no link for my Life List. Why? Because writing one somewhat terrifies me! Ok, that's not entirely true. The actual writing part is rather fun, but it's that nagging "what if" question in the back of my mind while writing it that paralyzes the pen in my hand. That "what if" I fail to check off item #24, #31 or #86? "What if" I fall short of meeting all of my life goals? Will my life have been a failure? I realize that sounds overly dramatic and I realize that one can lead a full life even if they never climbed Mount Everest. Still, I'm left wondering if my time would be better spent writing down a list of fears that I need to overcome rather than a list of big life goals I want to complete?
When I read other people's Life Lists, again I wonder. And I can't help but think that some are for entertainment purposes only. Something to give the appearance that they are more motivated than they truly are. Or an attempt to paint an image of their future so it appears more glamourous and exciting than they really plan on making it. The whole idea of creating a Life List is to inspire and motivate you to do great things! But you have to question if these Life Lists are being taken seriously or if they're just another blogging fad.
Shortly after the movie The Bucket List came out, I've wanted to write my own Bucket List/Life List. I made mental notes of a few items such a list would entail, but never put pen to paper. Writing things down makes it feel concrete, cementing me to my words. Like ink etchings in skin, it's a permeant reminder and nearly impossible to erase. So those written words become a part of me, forever bound to me. And in this case, that scares me. Terrifies is more like it! Life Lists may be helpful, but they are also bittersweet. Checking off an item comes with a sense of pride and a welcomed sigh of relief, but failing to complete an item is often met with disappointment and a touch of despair.
I've always joked that the #1 item on my List List is...#1 Write a Life List. Of course that's not entirely true. Actually the #1 item on my list is "Say I love you first." As for the rest of the list, well right now that's being stored privately in my head, or at least for the time being.
I subscribe to the belief that you should do something everyday that scares you. So perhaps writing down a list of my biggest fears and confronting them is step #1, list item #1. With that said, take this post as a introduction to my Life List, an introduction to my fears.
What is the #1 item on your Life List? What is your #1 fear?
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