Should I Have A Will?

Should I have a will? It's a question many people ask, but one I never have. And if you’re anything like me, chances are you haven’t given it much thought either. Statistics say that 70-80% of Americans don't have a last will and testament! While that number should be discomforting to hear, it actually gave me some comfort in the fact that I’m not alone in ignoring one of life’s most important responsibilities. Writing a will is something I haven't given much thought to, partially because I'm so young and partially because I'm not afraid to die. Although I am afraid to imagine my family and friends grieving if/when that day should occur. It's upsetting to imagine them gathered around a conference table listening to the reading of my last will and testament. That is IF a last will and testament for me even existed, which it does not. I offer life insurance to my employees, but when it comes to taking care of myself, I think little of it. So in essence, I care more about their lives than my very own? I’m thinking that’s not normal.

I don't even have a beneficiary listed on my 401k. I'm not married. I don't have any kids. I don't even have a girlfriend. What I do have is a dog. Would he inherit the bulk of my estate? He is my best friend and the closest thing I have to a roommate. He’s sort of like my child, or at least I love him like one. So would a Bulldog qualify as my next of kin? I’m thinking probably not. But if I needed one good reason to write a will, he would be it. I want to make sure he goes to someone who can love him and care for him in the same manner in which I have. And really, shouldn’t we offer that same type of comfort and support system to all of our loved ones whether we’re alive or dead?

Sure money and material possessions are just soulless items, but it’s naive to think that the assets left behind don’t play a role in the days, weeks, months and even years after one’s death. For your family, the absence of a will only adds stress in an already stressful time. During any crisis, a family should come together and be strongly united. But when a will doesn’t exist, far too often a family becomes divided. They fight over these silly, soulless items. And why? Simply because you failed to clarify your final wishes. You didn’t take one of life’s most important responsibilities serious. And you didn’t care enough to lessen their burden.

Last night my Mom called asking for my social security number. She was revising her will and wanted to make sure that I received 1/3 (divided three ways between me and my two sisters) of my parent’s estate. Just her mentioning the word "will" struck terror in my heart! So I made countless dumb jokes in an attempt to lighten the mood and distract myself from the real conversation at hand. My greatest fear in life is losing either of my parents. I know their death is inevitable and that day will come. But for now, I don’t even want to think about it! Although for the first time, I asked the question I had never before asked...

Should I have a will?

My Mom’s answer was a short and profound - YES! I was surprised to learn both my sisters already had living wills. Then again both are older than me, married and have kids. I’m a young, childless bachelor. Although my status doesn’t matter and neither does yours. A will is for everyone - old, young, rich, poor, male, female, married, single, childless, childfull (is that even a word?). A lot of us think we're immortal, or at least we act that way by not planning for the eventuality of our unexpected death. The fact is you never know what's going to happen and when! So it's a good idea to make sure you have things organized the way you want them to be. After all, once you die, you won't be there to sort things out. And it's best not to leave those additional hardships and messy details on grieving family and friends that are left behind.

I realize I should be taking my own advice and writing a will as well. I like to find excuses not to by saying "it’s too hard" or "I don’t understand all the legal jargon." I feel overwhelmed naming people in my will and assigning dollar amounts. I have a fairly good idea what my net worth is, what my company is valued at, what my house has been appraised for, my car, my sportbike, etc. My problem is that I become an emotional mess! I feel like no matter who I name or how I divide it up that it wouldn’t seem fair. That I would hurt someone’s feelings and I wouldn't be there to apologize, or to explain, or to right my wrong. Just thinking of writing a will makes my brain hurt! So I avoid it because I’m weak, or lazy, or maybe I’m just flat out scared?

Writing a last will and testament feels a lot like writing a suicide note. It's so heavy and deep. Dark and depressing. It's so...final. Similar to paying taxes, writing a will is one of those chores in life we don't want to do, but know it's in our best interest that we do. I think if you can just get passed the unpleasantness of this task and get it over with, you’ll feel better. You’ll rest more soundly at night knowing that if the morning doesn’t come, you will have taken the necessary steps to show a final act of love to those who do see the sun rise another day.